


The Blind Leading The Blind

by anonymousComrade



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sgrub Session, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-10-11
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2017-10-24 12:17:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 23,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/263391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anonymousComrade/pseuds/anonymousComrade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's hard, going blind and trying to adjust.</p><p>It's hard. But one person understands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day 0

**Author's Note:**

> _Jumping off another person's prompt, I want to see an AU fic where all the trolls are growing up and their eyes start to turn to their blood color. Once Karkat learns that, he blinds himself in a fit of terror._
> 
>  _May I please see his friends finding him in the aftermath and then helping him master his senses so he can still become a threshecutioner? It'll be so hard as Karkat has to trust his friends with this new found vulnerability and rely on them to boot. And of course the self-loathing and the guilt because he did it himself._
> 
>  _As for who? I'll love it if it's a group effort of everyone supporting their leader in their own special way. But Sollux, Terezi, Tavros (or John or Dave if sburb still happened or something) are my favorites if group effort is too much. But even then, the writer can choose anyone as I just want to see the hurt/comfort happen._
> 
>  _Tl;dr: Karkat's blind and needs to learn how to rely/trust someone to get him through it._
> 
> I took this prompt in July. It is now _October. Slow writer, worst filler_
> 
> So when I took this, I figured I could finish it in a week, two tops. Yeah, I was wrong. I wrote and rewrote this, had a few people proofread, and I had to deal with IRL stuff like moving and getting a job and that's why it's been three damn months.
> 
> And the best part is that I'm _still not finished_
> 
> So, instead of writing it, then posting the whole thing at once, I figured I'd post it in parts. That way, at least there's something to show for all this time spent
> 
> I hope whoever requested it enjoys it!

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS, you are seven solar sweeps old, and you have just done something monumentally stupid.

Actually, no. "Stupid" doesn't begin to cover it. "Stupid" is what Sollux was for not saving backups of the game code he wrote for Aradia a sweep ago before his computer exploded. "Stupid" is what you'd call the kind of person who hangs fake shame globes off the back of their scuttlebuggy. What _you've_ done is so staggeringly idiotic that it loops around the scale and back into pure genius.

 _Past you._ This is all _his_ fault. How did that gaper-panned idiot _ever_ manage to convince you this was a good idea? Sure, he's screwed you over pretty often before, but this is the first time he has actively tried to _murder_ you. One day, you're going to make Sollux figure out how to stab someone over the Alternet, and when you do, the fucking streets will run with that guy's disgusting red mutant slop, and you will disappear in a poof of paradox and the entire goddamn world will be better for it.

You have to get help, no way around it. You stumble your way up to your room, no help from your lusus because he's out hunting or doing whatever the fuck it is lusii do right after sunrise, which apparently doesn't involve being at his charge's hive and doing anything that could be even remotely useful.

You're pretty sure you left Trollian open at your computer, at least, but trying to contact any specific person is going to be a crapshoot. You double-click around your screen until you hear the "new conversation" chime, then you pray you managed to get in touch with someone you can stand.

>Be one of Karkat's friends.

You are TAVROS NITRAM, and you are still getting used to these robotic legs Equius built for you. Actually, it was thanks to Nepeta that you have them at all; she kind of pressured him into it. You're still kind of clumsy at using them, but even that beats the four-wheeled device you had to use before getting them.

Oh hey, your computer is beeping. Looks like you've got a new message.

>Tavros: Check messages.

You manage to only trip and fall once on your way from the table to your desk. You're getting better at this!

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling adiosToreador [AT] \--

CG: zzzzzzzzzzzfuck i hope i got someone here.'  
CG: IS aNYONE Zzzzzzzthere/?  
CG: HELLO;  
CG: afor the lolbe og god if youjr'e there say something  
CG: zhello////////////  
CG: GOD DMANIKT Zzzzzzzcome om  
AT: oH, HI kARKAT,  
AT: iS, UH, SOMETHING WRONG?  
CG: OZh thnank god  
CG: listen'  
CG: I NEED YOU Tzo start an audio chat, whoever uuou are  
CG: cAN YOU DO THAT  
CG: ONE REZZzzzzply for yes, ywo for no  
AT: yES, THAT IS SOMETHING THAT UH, i CAN DEFINITELY DO, AT THIS TIME,  
CG: OKAy good  
CG: do ikt  
adiosToreador [AT] wants to begin audio chat. Accept/decline?  
Accepted! Audio chat is now active.

You reach for your headset and power it on before hanging it off one of your horns. "Hey, uh, Karkat, what's going on?"

"Oh thank God, it's _Tavros_." You can hear him breathe a sigh of relief. "Okay, this is good. Fuck, I could have done so much worse."

"What are you talking about?"

"Tavros, I just did something completely moronic and now I'm hurt, which is the understatement of the goddamned sweep. I'm talking world record for stupidity here. Historians decasweeps from now will find records of my idiocy and I will become some legendary representation of failure. People will offer sacrifices to me in hopes that my gaze will be averted, thus sparing them from tasting of my shame."

"Uh, that definitely doesn't sound good."

"No shit. Listen, I need you to get help. You need to talk to some people, and _only_ those people, understand? I definitely don't need the fucking bluebloods knowing about this, okay?"

"Hey, uh, Vriska's not that bad! That is, um, once you get to know her, of course."

"Yeah, sure, whatever. Listen, Tavros, I need you to get a hold of Sollux and Terezi, and tell them to come to my hive, okay?"

"Um, yeah, don't worry, I've got this."

"I'm fucking trusting you, okay? I'm putting my goddamn life in your hands. It's up to you to contact everyone I said to and get them to come. I'm going to rest a bit after I get off here, while I wait for them. Understand? It is priority fucking _one_ that you do this for me."

Whoa, he's _serious_ about this. Something must be REALLY wrong. "Don't worry, Karkat. Your friend Tavros has, um, got your back."

"Okay. I'm off. And, um... thanks. For helping me, even though I'm a complete dipshit."

>Tavros: Alert Sollux and Terezi of Karkat's distress.

\-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA] and gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

AT: hEY, UH, GUYS,  
AT: sOMETHING IS VERY WRONG, WITH kARKAT,  
AT: hE JUST SENT ME A, UM, WEIRD MESSAGE,  
AT: aND THEN WE DID AUDIO CHAT FOR A BIT,  
AT: hE SAYS HE NEEDS YOU TO, UH, GO TO HIS HIVE,  
AT: aND THAT HE NEEDS HELP, RIGHT NOW, IS WHAT HE SAYS,  
TA: diid he 2ay what wa2 wrong?  
AT: nO, HE DIDN'T,  
AT: hE JUST SAID THAT, UH, i NEEDED TO CONTACT YOU TWO,  
AT: iT SOUNDED LIKE, HE WAS REALLY IN TROUBLE, THOUGH,  
GC: WH4TS TH4T? K4RKL3S 1S 1N TROUBL3?  
GC: 1F H3 N33DS OUR H3LP, WHY NOT CONT4CT US D1R3CTLY?  
AT: i, DON'T KNOW,  
AT: iT WAS KIND OF, UM, STRANGE,  
AT: hE DIDN'T SEEM LIKE, HE KNEW HE WAS MESSAGING ME,  
AT: mORE LIKE, UM, HE WAS TRYING TO GET A MESSAGE OUT TO, ANYONE,  
TA: no  
TA: NO  
TA: 2hiit!  
TA: ii 2hould have seen thii2 fuckiing comiing.  
TA: godDAMNIIT!  
TA: what kiind of fuckiing friiend am ii?  
GC: S33N WH4T COM1NG >:?  
TA: KK paniicked ye2terday about hii2 eye color 2tarting two come iin.  
TA: ii told hiim iit wa2 no biig deal.  
TA: but he kept raviing about how iit wa2 goiing two reveal hii2 2ecret or 2ome 2hiit.  
TA: and then ii got mad and told hiim two go bliind hiim2elf iif hii2 eye color bothered hiim 2o much.  
TA: ii diidn't thiink he'd actually fuckiing go and do iit!  
TA: fuck guy2, what have ii done?  
TA: thii2 ii2 all my fault  
TA: why can't ii keep my wiindhole 2hut?  
TA: FUCK  
GC: SOLLUX!  
GC: C4N 1T  
GC: 1TS PROB4BLY NOTH1NG  
GC: BUT W3 SHOULD PROB4BLY GO CH3CK ON H1M TO B3 SUR3 H3S OK4Y  
GC: M33T YOU GUYS 4T H1S H1V3?  
AT: wAIT, "yOU GUYS?"  
GC: Y3S  
GC: YOU COM3 TOO  
GC: 1F 1TS S3R1OUS, W3 M1GHT N33D TH3 3XTR4 H3LP  
AT: wHAT, ABOUT gAMZEE, HE'S HERE WITH ME,  
AT: i DON'T WANT TO JUST LEAVE HIM HERE, BY HIMSELF,  
GC: BR1NG H1M TH3N  
GC: 1V3 GOT TO G3T R34DY, TH3 D4YSU1T T4K3S FOR3V3R TO PUT ON >:/  
TA: 2ee you there, TZ.  
\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] left the conversation --  
TA: ii 2hould get goiing two, ii liive further away from KK than 2he doe2, after all.  
TA: thank2 for the head2 up, TR.  
AT: nO PROBLEM,  
\-- twinArmageddons [TA] left the conversation --  
\-- terminallyCapricious [TC] joined the conversation --  
TC: HeY GuYs, WhAt tHe mOtHeRfUcK Is uP!  
TC: hOnK :o)  
TC: AwW, eVeRyBoDy aLrEaDy uP AnD LeFt!  
AT: uH, gAMZEE, WHAT ARE YOU, DOING,  
TC: jUsT ChEcKiNg oUt tHiS LiTtLe mEeTiNg eVeRyOnE WaS In.  
TC: BuT... iT LoOkS LiKe i fUcKiN' mIsSeD It!  
AT: yEAH, BUT, WE NEED TO GET GOING,  
AT: wE'RE SUPPOSED TO GO TO kARKAT'S,  
TC: ThAnKs fOr tElLiN' a bRo aBoUt wHaT AlL'S GoInG DoWn.  
TC: nOw lEt's gEt oUr mOtHeRfUcKiN' mOvE On!  
TC: BuT YoU'Ll hAvE To dRiVe, I sTiLl aIn't pAsSeD ThAt fUcKiN' tEsT YeT!  
AT: nO PROBLEM,  
AT: lET'S GO,  
\-- adiosToreador [AT] left the conversation --  
\-- terminallyCapricious [TC] left the conversation --

>Be the best friend.

You are now SOLLUX CAPTOR, and you are practically kicking yourself for being this stupid. Not literally, of course, that would be silly and accomplish nothing. But you'd probably deserve it, and mentally, you are giving yourself quite the thrashing for putting the idea in your best friend's thinkpan.

Of course, you aren't 100% certain that this is what happened, but all of the evidence points toward it. No time to think about that now, though, you've got to get to Karkat's hive and help him. You pack some medical supplies (bandages, disinfectants, painkillers) into your sylladex and make your way to your communial hivestem's parking garage.

You open the door to your scuttlebuggy, start the engine, activate the antisolar cover, and drive off. The sun's coming up, and it's a long way to KK's place, after all.

>Be the girl.

You are now TEREZI PYROPE, and you are very worried for your friend. One sweep ago, you were made to stare into the sun via mind control, courtesy of one Vriska Serket, and what is unfolding now is an eerie reminder of what happened last sweep.

You don't have a scuttlebuggy, on account of being blind and thus not legally allowed to drive one, and in any case, you'd have nowhere to park it. Fortunately for you, the forest you live in will provide enough shade and cover to get you most of the way to Karkat's house without frying you. You'll have to use the daysuit to go the final distance; it's cumbersome, heavy, and it's still hot as hell wearing it, but you'll gladly endure it. Karkat is one of your best friends, and he needs your help.

>Be the stoned guy.

You are now GAMZEE MAKARA, and you know something isn't right. You were rapping with your bro Tavros when the call came through; your buddy Karkat is in trouble, and it's up to you to bail him out.

No motherfuckin' problem, you thought. But the more you think about it, the more you don't like it. This all seems so familiar, like it all already went down before and you're just watching it again like a bad rerun.

Wait, fuuuuuck, it _did_! Isn't someone sending a weird message the biggest sign of trouble there is? Tavros sent everyone messages for help when he got paralyzed, Terezi tried to send out messages when she went blind, and now Karkat sent Tavros a strange message.

That's downright motherfuckin' _ominous_ , is what that is.

>Karkat: Rest.

Try as you might, you can't.

It's the middle of the day, you should be dead tired right now, but circumstances have left you with an inability to sleep. The sopor slime of the recuperacoon does nothing to ease you now.

You only have yourself to blame, you know. Past you may ultimately be responsible but you _were_ him not that long ago. If you had stopped to think for even a second, you wouldn't be in this mess. But, of course, you didn't. You decided to act on impulse and to hell with the consequences. A lot of fucking good that did you!

What the fuck were you thinking? Seriously, what the hell made you think this was a good idea? _Maybe_ you could have gotten away with not being culled. Maybe Feferi's revolution will succeed, maybe you could have argued your case and just been forbidden a matesprit or kismesis to keep you from contaminating the gene pool if you could prove you're more valuable to the empire alive than dead. But no, you decided you had to act, that anything was better than someone finding your secret, and now they're going to cull you for sure. Nice job, fucko!

The worst scenarios are racing through your mind now. What if they react badly? What if they decide to leave you to your fate? What if they decide to cull you themselves? Surely not. Surely they'll help you, these are your friends you're talking about. Surely they'll still help you.

And yet, in the back of your mind, you can't help but think the worst.

Maybe you should just stay quiet when they get here. If you're lucky, they'll give up and leave.

>Anyone: Be the first to arrive.

When you approach Karkat's hive, you find the door is still open. This isn't a good sign. His lusus doesn't seem to be in, so you make your way inside as you remove the mask of the daysuit.

"Karkat? Are you here?" You call to him as you peel off the rest of the daysuit but there's no response, only silence. You sniff the air, but you get nothing. Then you make your way to the stairs because you remember his respiteblock is on the second floor.

"Where are you, Karkat? You're scaring me." First, Tavros tells you Karkat says he needs help, and now this. Something is most definitely not right. You feel your way along to the door of his respiteblock and knock three times.

"It's Terezi. Are you okay?" You listen intently but there's no response from the other side. You turn to leave and search elsewhere in his hive when you barely hear it, a sniffling sound from behind the door.

 _He's here._

You try the door; it's unlocked. You step into his respiteblock and inhale sharply. _There_ , against the wall, the unmistakable licorice black of his shirt and iron grey of his skin.

You think he might be crying, but he's hugging his knees and his head is buried in his arms. You approach him slowly, carefully. If he was trying to _avoid_ help, then something _terrible_ must have happened.

" _There_ you are. What's wrong?"

You bring an arm up to rub his shoulder but he swats it away. "Leave me alone."

"You're the one who asked for help. What happened?"

"I said, go away. I fucked up, I'll deal with it myself."

"Karkat, please. If you're hurt, let me help."

" _I said leave!_ " he shouts, and he turns his face toward you, eyes wide open. You breathe in to get a read on his expression but it's not one of anger, it's fear. But the worst part, _the worst part_ , is the cherry red that his eyes are practically _screaming_.

"Oh... oh, Karkat, no... not you..." The flashbacks come fast and hard. You've been there before, the memories of the time this very thing happened to you keep flowing. You know what he must be going through right now. The anxiety, the doubt, the self-loathing, not to mention the pain, you were no stranger to it. The sudden deprivation is fucking _terrifying_ and no one understands but you.

He speaks, voice shaky and rasping. Who knows how long he was like this before he decided to get help? "F-f-fuck you. You probably think this is some fucking party, don't you? Like we're goddamn _blind buddies_ now or some shit. Well, fuck you, Terezi, fuck youuuuu..." His words devolve into sobbing as he stops trying to fight you.

"We'll get you through this, Karkat. I promise." You take hold of his hand; rather than pull away, like you're expecting, he grasps your hand as though it's the only thing keeping him safe.

You hear footsteps downstairs. The others are here, too.

>Sollux: Meet up with Tavros and Gamzee.

You, Tavros and Gamzee arrive at Karkat's hive at almost the same time. The door's still open, which doesn't bode well. The three of you walk in and you shut the door behind you before splitting up to look for him.

"KK? Where are you?" you call out.

"Up here," a voice you think is Terezi's responds from upstairs. She must have gotten here first.   
The three of you climb the stairs and enter his respiteblock. Karkat is sitting, back against the far wall, and Terezi sits next to him, arm slung around his shoulders. You open your mouth to speak and get as far as "Hey KK, what's--" before he opens his eyes and you instinctively flinch at the sight.

They're bright, solid red. Just like... just like hers.

You stop, try to catch your breath for a moment. You actually feel physically ill from knowing what happened to your best friend, from seeing his ruined eyes and the dark grey burns on his face. This is your fault, you snapped at him and told him to do this and he actually went through with it.

"Oh my God, KK, fuck, I wasn't serious! Shiiiit, why did I say those things?! I didn't think you'd actually do it!"

"Don't fucking _do_ this right now, Sollux, I can't _handle_ you feeling sorry for yourself on top of all this!"

"It's my fault, all my fault!" you reply, barely even aware he's speaking. "I should have fucking _known_ you might actually do it. What kind of friend _am_ I?"

"Sollux, man, don't do this, it was an accident, I swear!" Karkat responds.

"Bull _shit_ , you're just trying to get me to shut up! Screw you! You're a _bulge!_ "

"Oh yeah, yell at _the blind guy!_ Some friend _you_ are, asshole! Get the fuck out of my hive before I call the legislacerators!"

"Oh God KK you're right, what am I even _doing_ , I'm the worst friend ever--"  
"No, I am, you're just trying to help and I'm being a complete nookwipe--"  
"--needed my help and I just started shouting at you--"  
"--what kind of douchebag even snaps at people like that--"  
"A _hem_."

The sound of Terezi clearing her throat makes the two of you stop bickering. Geez, what an embarrassing display _that_ was.

"So, what happened?" you ask, to change the subject.

"I told you, it was an accident. I was out later than I thought, the sun was coming up and I was running back here as fast as I could. I tried to shield my eyes but my hive was in the same direction as the sunrise. I thought I could make it back in time. I was wrong. That's all there is to it, okay?"

You nod. "Alright. Sorry I blew up just now." If it really was an accident, then the last thing he needs is you being a sad sack about it.

"Not a goddamned word about this to anyone, you fucking hear me?" he adds. Not that he needed to, this is the kind of thing people get culled over. You will keep this secret until he learns to adjust.

Gamzee is the only one who responds. "Duuuuuuuude... this is some motherfuckin' heavy shit, bro. Can you even fuckin' see out of those?"

Karkat gives off an annoyed sigh. "No, I can't see _shit_ , Gamzee. Kind of why I called you guys out here. Wait, why are you even here?"

"I asked Tavros to come over in case we needed his help," Terezi replies. "Gamzee was with him, so I told him to just bring Gamzee with him. I'm sorry, I didn't know all _this_ had happened."

That makes you remember why you came in the first place. "I-I brought some stuff from my hive, first aid, gauze and ointments and shit like that."

You eject your sylladex and sort through what you've brought for the relevant items; namely, the bandages, the burn cream, and the bottle of painkillers, wherever the fuck it is in this pile of bullshit. Tavros and Gamzee approach Karkat, unsure of what to do.

"Hey, uh, Karkat? Is there anything that, uh, Gamzee and I can do, to help, that is?"

He thinks for a moment. "I guess. You two clowns go downstairs and stand guard. I don't want some opportunistic jackass noticing I'm blind and thinking it's okay to take my shit."

"Um, okay! Can do, Karkat. Don't worry, Gamzee and I have, uh, got this," Tavros says as you hear the flash of his strife specibus activating and placing a lance in his hand.

"Ain't nobody gettin' the motherfuck past us!" Gamzee adds, clubs cutting the air as he twirls them round.

They exit and make for the first floor. You start applying the balm to one of the bandages before affixing it to Karkat's face.

"You really think someone taking your stuff is the biggest problem you have right now, KK?"

"No, but they're here, they might as well make themselves useful. If I thought I was in any real danger yet, I would have sent Terezi."

"You think the blind girl's a better fighter than TR and GZ?" You earn a punch to the shoulder from said blind girl for that one.

"Better than the reigning champion of absconding and the guy who gets distracted by his own sylladex? Do I really have to fucking explain?"

"...Good point." You have to concede that one.

"Fuck, you guys, what the hell did I just do to myself? I'm going to get culled for sure. Shit, maybe I deserve it for being a stupid fuckup."

That gives you an idea. " _Shiiiiiit_ , KK, you think maybe Equius can make robot eyes for--"

" _ **NO.**_ " He tries to poke you in the chest but misses and hits your arm. _Do not_ tell Equius about this. Don't tell _anyone_ about this, you fucking hear me? The second this gets out, I'm as good as dead. You can't fucking tell _anyone_!"

"Then how are you gonna--"

"I'll teach him. It didn't take me long to learn how to taste colors, so I bet I can do it, no problem." Terezi's interjection surprises you, but it's a sound plan if she can actually pull it off.

"I think it's thirty days until the next patrols. Think you can teach him smell-o-vision by then?"

She smiles wide, all the confidence in the world radiating from her face. "I _know_ I can."


	2. Day 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a lusus discovers an injured charge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part is pretty short. Too short to stand on its own, really, and I probably could have posted it yesterday, but for whatever reason I didn't think to. Consider this the last bit of part one, if you want.

\- DAY 1 -

>Karkat: Be a useless piece of shit all day and sleep all these hours.

Done.

>Sollux and Tavros: Leave after a few hours because you have responsibilities to your lusii.

Way ahead of you.

>Gamzee: Go with them because Tavros is driving your ride back to your place.

Already taken care of.

>Terezi: Stick around because you have literally no other obligations.

On it.

The others left hours ago. Sollux's lusus is chained to the roof of his communal hivestem and Tavros's is too small to get food for itself, so both of them left to take care of their lusii. Gamzee left with them, because otherwise, it would be an hour's walk back to his hive. Not that he hasn't made the trip before, but you couldn't let him this time, not when transportation is so easily available.

That leaves you. Your lusus never hatched; therefore, you have no responsibilities to it. There's nothing to do at your hive, anyway, and even if there were, you wouldn't leave. You look at Karkat sleeping, still fully clothed, in his recuperacoon, and take stock of what you'll need if you're to teach him before the next time the cull squads come knocking.

A clatter downstairs shakes you out of your thoughts. You grip your walking stick as you slowly creep downstairs. You will face this intruder and run it out of Karkat's hive yourself.

>Terezi: Prepare to face the interloper.

You hide behind a corner as you hear the intruder approach. You're reading yourself for a surprise attack when it vocalizes, something like a gurgle and a growl mixed into one noise. It's one you've heard before. You step out of hiding and take a deep breath through your nostrils; it's the salty scent of the sea and the odor of freshly-caught fish, with just a hint of vanilla.

You smile. It's been a while since you've seen this guy. "Hey, crabby, how's it going?"

He scuttles toward you, warily at first, and moves its face near yours to get a good look. Then it makes another noise as he recognizes you, sort of a combination of a hearty laugh and a warble. It drops its catch onto the floor before giving you a big cholerbear hug with shelled arms.

Unlike Karkat himself, you've always gotten along really well with his lusus.

>Terezi: Break the bad news.

"I wish I were here on happier terms, crabman. Karkat's gone and hurt himself. Pretty badly, actually."

The lusus pulls away from you, blinks once and turns his head to the side, like he's asking you what happened.

"He accidentally caught the sun in his face and... his eyes." You point to your own. "They're like mine now. He can't see anymore."

He lowers his head and makes a sad gurgle. Despite their near-perpetual arguing and altercations, the lusus cares deeply for his charge, and this is most definitely not good news.

"He's got a pretty bad sunburn on his face too, but that'll heal. He's not hurt otherwise. Well, not physically, anyway. You know how Karkles is, this was a huge blow to his psyche. Poor guy, he's gonna have to learn, isn't he?"

Karkat's lusus pats you on the shoulder with one of his huge pincers.

"Of course I'll help him. I know what he's going through right now."

He chirps quizzically at you.

"I'm gonna teach him how to smell and taste colors like I do. "

He makes the same noise again, then points one claw toward the stairs.

"Yeah, he's up in his respiteblock if you want to check up on him. He was sleeping when I came downstairs, so that's probably what he's doing now." The lusus starts climbing the stairs to get a look at Karkat himself.

"Hey, now that you're here, I'm going to run back to my hive and get some stuff, okay? I didn't want to leave him alone like this." It nods at you, then you leave for your own hive.


	3. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Terezi's resolve is established.

>Karkat: Wake up.

Every fiber of your being doesn't want to. You'd rather stay in your recuperacoon and pretend that maybe yesterday didn't happen and maybe you aren't actually fucking blind.

"Hey Karkat! Time to wake up!" The sound of your door suddenly opening coupled with her voice startles you, jolting you from that state between waking and dreaming as you acknowledge, with more than a little annoyance, that Terezi is still here.

You turn your back to her, thankful you apparently got into the slime still fully-dressed. The last thing you need is an embarassing incident on top of all of this. "Go away."

She exhales sharply before replying. "Still intent on doing this yourself, Karkles?" You cringe at the mention of the stupid nickname she gave you a sweep ago.

The slime crackles and pops as you work your way to the edge of the recuperacoon. "Do you need any help?" she asks.

"No. Not from you or anyone else," you tell her. It's a lie, but one you're hoping she'll buy. You have to learn how to cope with your new disability, after all, and you've done an admirable job of living with your _other_ disability so far. You're kind of used to the universe shitting on you at every chance, you can get used to this, right?

"You're lying. We're on a time limit, remember?" Of course, she sees right through your bullshit. She takes hold of your arm to help you steady yourself as you exit the recuperacoon.

And you slap her hands away like the stupid wriggler you are.

"Don't _touch_ me, I'm fine," you say, as you sling a slime-covered leg over your recuperacoon, lean over, and fall face-first onto the floor. What are you doing, you're not kidding anyone.

"Well? Are you getting up?" Is she taunting you? Is she _trying_ to piss you off? What's she still doing here, anyway?

"Good to see you're treating this situation with the utter fucking respect and care it deserves instead of pretending it's all some kind of sick game! What, are you taking bets on how long the blind guy can go without running into walls or falling down the stairs or shitting himself? Go home. Get out of my hive."

She walks toward you and kneels down, not that you can see it, before she speaks. "Do you remember when I went blind?"

"What _about_ it?"

She grabs your wrist to help you up. "I barely do. I know, it seems like the kind of thing you wouldn't ever forget, but I really don't remember a lot about it. Maybe I didn't want to. I just remember it was scary, and I wished I had someone to help me through it. So, I'm going to take care of you." She says it less like she's going to tend to someone with an injury and more like it's some kind of vacation, in a manner that sounds entirely too enthusiastic about the whole ordeal.

"Fuck. That. Noise. I need you around here like I need a hole in my thinkpan." Why your lusus isn't throwing more a fit at her presence, you'll never know. It's always chased away your _other_ friends when they tried to come over, why does it seem to like Terezi so much?

You feel around, trying to find your closet. "Your left. No, further. Right there," she says. Stupid helpful crazy idiot, who does she think she is?

"Get out of here, I'm changing."

"I can't see either, Karkat."

"I don't want you _smelling_ my nudity. Out." That earns a hearty cackle before she makes her exit.

You peel off your slime-slick shirt. The burns still mark your upper body, though, and you wince as the soaked fabric makes contact with them. You wipe the excess slime from yourself with what you're pretty sure is a spare shirt, because fuck asking Terezi to get you a towel.

Finally, when you're changed into clothes not covered in sopor slime, you stumble your way to your respiteblock's exit, where Terezi's still waiting.

"You're still here."

"Yeah."

"I told you to get the fuck out."

"I know."

You groan in exasperation as you walk down the hallway. "Goddamnit, Terezi. I don't need your help, I've been doing pretty well living by myself for the last seven sweeps."

"Which is why you called me, Sollux, Tavros and Gamzee over the minute something went horribly wrong, right? Because you can deal with that yourself?"

"Past me is an _idiot_ , in case you haven't noticed," you reply. "I mean, he thought _you_ were a good choice to watch my back."

"Oh?"

"Oh yeah, I really want the psychotic blind tree girl watching over me while I'm helpless. What could possibly go wrong with trusting one half of the fucking _Scourge Sisters_?"

"Karkat, I haven't been a Scourge Sister or even talked to Vriska for a sweep."

"Once a crazy bitch, always a crazy bitch."

She responds by suddenly tilting up her walking stick, smacking into your chest with a dull _thwack_. "The stairs," she says. "You almost fell." You carefully feel around the area in front of you with your foot and she's right.

Wow. Terezi looks out for you and all you do is insult her? Past you is a _jerk_. And you _were_ him not that long ago, so that makes _you_ a jerk, by association. You are kind of embarrassed by the whole conversation you've had with her since waking up now.

"I'm not here, Karkat," she says, "because I feel like I have to be. I'm here because I _want_ to be. I'm here because you're my friend, and you need help, and I can help you. And believe it or not, I give a damn about you." You think you can detect a bit of hurt coming from that last sentence. _Now_ you've gone and done it. Way to be a total bulge to the one person willing to help your stupid ass.

She takes your hand to lead you downstairs, slowly and carefully. You don't slap her away this time.

"S... sorry for going off on you like that."

"It's okay, I know how it is. It's frustrating and everything sucks. It's not easy, but it gets better, I promise."

The two of you reach the ground floor without incident. She squeezes your hand before letting go. "Now, let's get you something to eat. You've been asleep for nearly two days, you must be starving."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter may be a while, I'm having to restructure it a bit and I'm not entirely sure how yet
> 
> Also it's mostly pesterlogs, if you like that sort of thing


	4. Day 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tavros slips up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big ups to lantadyme for proofreading this section, it makes a bit more sense than it did now. I still think it's not the best part of this fic (my favorite part is the _next_ one) but it's definitely much improved over earlier revisions.

\-- centaursTesticle [CT] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

CT: D --> I am afraid the answer is no, Miss Pyrope   
GC: >:?   
CT: D --> It is nothing personal, I assure you  
CT: D --> As STRONGLY as it ve%es me to admit it  
CT: D --> It is simply beyond even my skill with roboti% to craft such items  
CT: D --> It is e%eedingly frustrating   
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU T4LK1NG 4BOUT   
CT: D --> The robotic eyes you asked about  
CT: D --> Or rather, asked Nepeta about  
CT: D --> I pride myself on my craftsmanship but such complicated wor% are impossible  
CT: D --> The optical sensors I used when I built Aradia's mechanical body cannot be adapted to work with a living troll's body  
CT: D --> It is beginning to make me rather %   
GC: 1 D1DNT 4SK N3P3T4 TO 4SK YOU TO M4K3 M3 4 S3T OF 3Y3S   
CT: D --> If not for you, who might they be for   
GC: 1 DONT KNOW  
GC: 1 N3V3R 4SK3D FOR TH3M 1N TH3 F1RST PL4C3 4ND 1 DONT KNOW WHY SH3D W4NT TH3M 31TH3R   
CT: D --> You are lying  
CT: D --> You will stop lying  
CT: D --> I order you to tell me the truth  
CT: D --> Or perhaps I will order Nepeta to do so  
CT: D --> You know she will tell me   
GC: N3P3T4 DO3SNT KNOW 4NYTH1NG  
GC: 4ND 1M NOT T3LL1NG YOU  
GC: 1D R4TH3R NOT S33 MY FR13ND CULL3D   
CT: D --> You are covering for someone then   
GC: S1NC3 WH3N 4M 1 TH3 ON3 ON TR14L H3R3!  
GC: TH1S 1S H1GHLY D1SCONC3RT1NG >:/  
GC: YOU W1LL STOP TH1S L1N3 OF QU3ST1ON1NG 1MM3D14T3LY!   
CT: D --> You will tell me what has happened   
GC: NOT 4 CH4NC3  
GC: YOULL M4K3 SUR3 H3 G3TS PUT 4T TH3 TOP OF TH3 L1ST!   
CT: D --> Nonsense  
CT: D --> Just because I am a STRONG believer in the hemospectrum does not mean I support wasteful culling  
CT: D --> I will have you know that I personally put in an appeal on Mister Nitram's behalf while I crafted his legs   
GC: D1DNT N3P3T4 PR3TTY MUCH M4K3 YOU DO TH4T   
CT: D --> Yes  
CT: D --> But she had an e%ellent argument in favor of doing so   
GC: W3LL  
GC: UGH 1 DONT L1K3 TH1S 4T 4LL  
GC: BUT TH3R3S NOT MUCH T1M3 B3FOR3 TH3 P4TROLS  
GC: 4ND  
GC: STR1K1NG 4 D34L W1TH YOU M4Y B3 H1S B3ST CH4NC3 4T G3TT1NG THROUGH TH1S 4L1V3  
GC: H3 M4D3 M3 SW34R NOT TO T3LL 4NYONE  
GC: BUT 1F 1T M34NS S4V1NG H1S L1F3, WH4T CHO1C3 DO 1 H4V3?  
GC: YOU UND3RST4ND WH4T 1S 4T ST4K3 H3R3 R1GHT?  
GC: WH4T 1M R1SK1NG, YOU CR33P?  
GC: YOU W1LL SW34R ON YOUR P3RF3CT BLU3 BLOOD TH4T YOU LOV3 SO MUCH  
GC: 1F 1 T3LL YOU WH4TS GO1NG ON  
GC: YOU W1LL NOT T3LL 4NYONE 4BOUT TH1S  
GC: UND3RST4ND?   
CT: D --> Y  
CT: D --> Yes   
GC: TH1S 1S 4 M4TT3R OF L1F3 4ND D34TH  
GC: YOU WONT T3LL 4NYON3 4BOUT TH1S  
GC: TH4TS NOT 4 QU3ST1ON, SW34TY  
GC: TH4TS 4N ORD3R   
CT: D --> Well I never  
CT: D --> Ordering a b100d superior around  
CT: D --> Never have I seen such disrespect  
CT: D --> I  
CT: D --> I order you to do it again   
GC: BLUHHHHHHHHHHHH  
GC: GO G3T 4 TOW3L B3FOR3 YOU SHORT OUT YOUR K3YBO4RD  
GC: 1 C4N PR4CT1C4LLY T4ST3 YOU SW34T1NG FROM H3R3  
GC: OH 3W 3W 3W 3W 3W 3W 3WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW  
GC: FORG3T 1 S41D TH4T  
GC: SW34R YOU WONT T3LL 4NYON3!  
GC: 1F YOU DO 1 W1LL K1LL YOU MYS3LF   
CT: D --> I vow never to udder a word of what you are about to say to anyone  
CT: D --> Under pain of death  
CT: D --> Oh my  
CT: D --> I am working up quite the sweat   
GC: OK4Y  
GC: 1TS  
GC: 1TS K4RK4T  
GC: H3S HURT  
GC: H1S 3Y3S 4R3 M3SS3D UP L1K3 M1N3  
GC: 1 W4NT TO T34CH H1M HOW TO S33 4G41N, 1N 4 M4NN3R  
GC: 1T D1DNT T4K3 M3 V3RY LONG TO L34RN, SUR3LY 1 C4N T34CH H1M B3FOR3 TH3 N3XT CULL P4TROL  
GC: 4ND 1F NOT  
GC: P3RH4PS YOU C4N F1ND 4 W4Y  
GC: TH1S 1S 4 B1G D34L 3QU1US, K4RK4T 1S MY FR13ND 4ND 1 W4NT H1M TO G3T THROUGH TH1S   
CT: D --> Understandable  
CT: D --> If anything similar were to happen to Nepeta I would do anything in my power to aid her   
GC: OK4Y SOM3ON3 3LS3 1S TROLL1NG M3 NOW  
GC: R3M3MB3R, NOT 4 WORD 4BOUT K4RK4T'S CURR3NT PR3D1C4M3NT TO 4NYON3!!!   
CT: D --> Yes  
CT: D --> Of course  
CT: D --> It's a secret to everyone  
CT: D --> Where did I put that blasted towel

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling centaursTesticle [CT] \--

\-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

AT: hEY, UH, tEREZI,  
AT: hOW ARE THINGS GOING, wITH kARKAT,   
GC: COULD B3 4 LOT WORS3  
GC: COULD B3 4 LOT B3TT3R 1F 1 D1DNT JUST NOW H4V3 TO T4LK TO 3QU1US   
AT: aW, HE'S NOT SO BAD,  
AT: bUT THEN IT'S UH, pRETTY MUCH ENTIRELY THANKS TO HIM, tHAT i CAN WALK, AT ALL,   
GC: Y34H BUT SOM3TH1NG N3P3T4 S41D M4D3 H1M ST4RT SNOOP1NG 4ROUND  
GC: HOW SH3 FOUND OUT, 1 DONT KNOW  
GC: 1 H4D TO T3LL H1M 4BOUT K4RK4T, H3 WOULD H4V3 FOUND OUT 4NYW4Y >X[  
GC: 1 KNOW K4RK4T D1DNT W4NT H1M TO KNOW BUT H3 PR3TTY MUCH 4LR34DY D1D  
GC: 4ND W3 N33D 4LL TH3 H3LP W3 C4N G3T  
GC: 1 DONT TH1NK H3LL T3LL 4NYON3  
GC: BUT 1 H4D T4K3 D3SP3R4T3 M34SUR3S TO M4K3 SURE OF 1T  
GC: 1D R4TH3R NOT T4LK 4BOUT 1T, BL4444R >XP   
AT: oH UH, tHAT'S KIND OF, wHY i AM MESSAGING YOU, rIGHT NOW,  
AT: i MAY HAVE TOLD, UM, nEPETA, aBOUT kARKAT'S ACCIDENT,  
AT: cOMPLETELY ACCIDENTALLY, OF COURSE,  
AT: kARKAT'S GOING TO HATE ME FOR THIS, ISN'T HE, }:(   
GC: SH1T  
GC: H3 1S GO1NG TO K1LL TH3 BOTH OF US  
GC: OR 4T L34ST FL41L 4ROUND 1N OUR G3N3R4L D1R3CT1ONS  
GC: L3T M3 H4NDL3 TH1S  
GC: 1 W1LL M4K3 SUR3 TH1S DO3SNT G3T OUT OF H4ND

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] \--

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] \--

GC: TH3 M1GHTY DR4GONYYYD F1N4LLY C4TCH3S S1GHT OF H3R PR3Y!  
GC: SH3 SWOOPS DOWN FROM TH3 SKY 4ND D1V3BOMBS TH3 HUNT3R C4T  
GC: C4TCH1NG H3R 1N H3R CL4WS >:D   
AC: :33 < *the cat struggles to escape!*   
GC: BUT SH3 DO3SNT 4ND TH3 DR4GONYYYD C4RR13S H3R B4CK TO H3R N3ST  
GC: SHE OP3NS H3R F4NG3D MOUTH   
AC: :33 < oh no!  
AC: :33 < *the cat says, quaking in fear*   
GC: BUT 1NST34D OF 34T1NG TH3 C4T, SH3 JUST S4YS  
GC: "H3Y HOWS 1T GO1NG"   
AC :33 < hi terezi! long time no s33!   
GC: 1 4M 4CTU4LLY H3R3 ON BUS1N3SS!  
GC: TH3 BUS1N3SS OF...  
GC: 1NV3ST1G4T1ON!  
GC: MOR3 SP3C1F1C4LLY 1 W4NT TO KNOW WHY SW34TY MCHOOFB34ST THOUGHT 1 W4NT3D 4 S3T OF ROBOT 3Y3S  
GC: 1 SUSP3CT YOU M4Y H4V3 SOM3TH1NG TO DO W1TH 1T  
GC: 4CTU4LLY 1 4LR34DY KNOW YOU DO! SO SP1LL 1T S1ST3R >:]   
AC: :33 < ohh...  
AC: :33 < you caught me red-pawed!  
AC: :33 < tavros was explaining why he didnt make it to our fiduspawn match and he let it slip  
AC: :33 < and i just felt so bad for karkitty  
AC: :33 < i wanted to help, but i dont know anything about taking care of eyes...  
AC: :33 < so i asked my meowrail if he could make a pair of robot ones! but i didn't tell him they were fur karkat  
AC: :33 < i said you might be interested in using them   
GC: Y34H W3LL, 1 H4D TO T4LK TO H1M 4BOUT 1T 4ND LONG STORY SHORT, H3 KNOWS 4BOUT K4RK4T NOW TOO   
AC: :33 < i guess you could say, the cat's  
AC: B :33 < *paws*  
AC: B33 < out of the bag  
AC: B33 < M33YAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOWWWWWWW   
GC: FOR PUTT1NG 1NTO MOT1ON TH3 S3QU3NC3 OF 3V3NTS TH4T L3D TO 3QU1US F1ND1NG OUT 4BOUT K4RK4TS BL1NDN3SS  
GC: 4ND FOR M4K1NG M3 H4V3 TH3 MOST D1SGUST1NG CONV3RS4T1ON 3V3R W1TH YOUR P3RP3TU4LLY P3RSP1R1NG MO1R41L  
GC: 4ND FOR M4KING L1GHT OF TH1S S1TU4T1ON  
GC: 4ND *3SP3C14LLY* FOR TH4T HORR1BL3 TR41NWR3CK OF PUNS JUST NOW  
GC: WH4TS TH3 H1GH3ST NUMB3R YOU C4N TH1NK OF   
AC: :33 < 33 trillion?   
GC: 1 H3R3BY 4SS1GN TH3 3ST33M3D POUNC1LOR 33 TR1LL1ON RUMPUS D3M3R1TS  
GC: COURT 1S 4DJOURN3D   
AC: :33 < oh come on! how am i going to work off 33 trillion demerits?!   
GC: BY NOT T3LL1NG 4NYON3 3LS3 4BOUT K4RK4T  
GC: THOUGH TH3 L1ST OF P3OPL3 WHO DONT KNOW 1S G3TT1NG SHORT3R 3V3RY D4Y 1T S33MS!  
GC: 4R4D14, K4N4Y4, VR1SK4 4ND TH3 S34DW3LL3RS DONT KNOW Y3T  
GC: 4ND 1 TH1NK K4RK4T WOULD 4PPR3C14T3 1T 1F 1T ST4Y3D TH4T W4Y   
AC: :33 < *the kitty agr33s to k33p karkat's secret a secret from now on!*  
AC: :33 < but wont he have to tell efurryone someday?   
GC: M4YB3, BUT H3S ST1LL R3COV3R1NG  
GC: W3 ONLY KN3W 4BOUT 1T 4 F3W D4YS 4GO  
GC: 1 W4NT TO G1V3 H1M SOM3 T1M3 TO R3ST  
GC: TH3N  
GC: 1 W4NT TO TRY T34CH1NG H1M HOW TO S33 L1K3 M3   
AC: :33 < *the pouncilor wishes her dragon furriend luck*  
AC: :33 < *and hopes the grumpy crab gets better soon!*   
GC: TH3 4FOR3M3NT1ON3D DR4GON FR13ND 4CKNOWL3DG3S TH3 POUNC1LORS W3LL-W1SH3S 4ND M4K3S R3CORD OF TH3M 1N TH3 OFF1C14L LOGBOOK  
GC: 4ND TH3N NOT3S TH3 GRUMPY CR4B 1S ST1RR1NG FROM H1S SL33P 4ND W1LL R3QU1R3 4SS1ST4NC3 SOON   
AC: :33 < oh, you're at karkitty's hive?  
AC: :33 < *ac asks*   
GC: SOM3ON3 H4S TO B3  
GC: H3S NOT US3D TO B31NG BL1ND 4ND SOM3ON3 H4S TO T34CH H1M HOW TO DO TH1NGS  
GC: 1T 1S 4 DUTY TH4T 1 W1LL GL4DLY P3RFORM   
AC: :33 < that's  
AC: <:33 < really sw33t  
AC: :33 < i'm sorry, i have to go, pounce n33ds me!   
GC: H3H3 OK4Y  
GC: 1T W4S GOOD TO T4LK TO YOU 4G41N N3P3T4! >:]   
AC: :33 < same to you, terezi!

\-- arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell that I can't into puns or what


	5. Day 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Terezi learns the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in the same day? Amazing!
> 
> Actually this next part needed no further revision at all. I think it's perfect as-is, I just needed some time to untangle the last part's Terezi/Equius pesterlog and this would be good to go.
> 
> Enjoy!

>Karkat: Stumble around blindly.

No way, you've been doing enough of _that_ for the last week or so. Fuck that shit, you're staying right here on your goddamn couch in your own fucking respiteblock.

"Kaaaarkaat! After dinner, we're trying the chalk again!"

You just kind of groan. For the last couple of days, she's been quizzing you on what her chalk smells like, and then when you tell her it smells like chalk, she tells you you're wrong. If this is her way of teaching you to smell colors, it's not working. Red chalks smell like blue chalks smell like white chalks smell like green chalks, it's all the same and you're starting to get sick of the drill because it's clearly not working.

She and your lusus are cooking dinner right now. How a blind girl and a giant crab monster manage to cook anything is beyond you; you insisted on trying yesterday and nearly burned down your hive, and now Terezi has forbidden you from your own kitchen. She told you she's had experience doing this, that she's been blind for a lot longer than you have, and she had to learn how to do things for herself a long time ago and she'll teach you how to do it, too. You told her that was a load of bunk and it didn't matter because the cull squads would be coming for you any day now. She laughed at you and said the cull squads can have you when they pry you from her cold, dead hands.

You're starting to think she was serious about that. Tavros, Gamzee and Sollux have come to visit a few times since they discovered you; Gamzee has forgotten your new disability at least twice. But Terezi has practically moved in. Aside from a few trips back to her hive for supplies, she's stayed here ever since she found you, no matter how badly you treated her.

You remember how you ripped into her that second night she was here. She was just trying to help, and you were being such a douche to her. You hope the incident is forgotten now, because you didn't mean any of those things you said about her.

You really ought to apologize for that sometime.

"Dinner's ready!" she calls from below, followed up by that bellow your lusus uses when it wants your attention.

"What are we having?"

"Fish," she replies.

"Augh, _again_?"

"You want something else, take it up with crabman, he's the one having to hunt for three!" Your lusus roars in agreement.

You sigh as you rise to your feet and feel your way to your door. From there, you follow the wall to the stairs leading down. You carefully take a step, and again, and

You miss the stair entirely, sending you falling face-first. Your nose smashes into the edge of a stair and you flip over, as if the pain hadn't been enough to completely disorient you. You finally come to a stop on the floor. Your shirt is ripped, one of your shoes are off and God-knows-where, your nose is bloodied, you--

Your nose

Your motherfucking nose is _bloodied_

And Terezi will be out here _any second_

You start to panic. You think maybe if you can get back upstairs you can wash your face, stop the bleeding, but you try to stand and your left ankle gives out and you howl in pain. The damn thing's easily sprained, if not fucking broken.

 _she's going to find out_

"Karkat?! Are you okay?!"

 _she's going to know your secret_

"Karkat, where are-- oh my God, Karkat!"

 _she'll know_

"Oh no, I warned you about stairs, I told you to be careful! Are you okay?"

 _she's going to hate you_

"Karkat, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

 _don't let her find out **don't let her see**_  
"No, get back, stay away!"

"What's the matter? What's wrong?"

"I'm bleeding, I'm fucking bleeding--"  
"Then let me help--"  
"No, you can't-- don't you get it--"  
"What is there to get? You're hurt--"  
"Terezi, get the fuck away before I--"  
"Stop being such a fucking wriggler and--"

And then she _gasps_ , and for one moment, you are unable to say anything, or move, or so much as breathe, because now, you know the true meaning of terror.

She knows.

Someone

 _knows._

>Terezi: Discover Karkat's true blood color.

You aren't sure you picked up the right scent at first; maybe there's a stray red object somewhere in Karkat's livingblock that gave you a false positive, because there's no way this is true. It simply _can't be_.

But you move Karkat's hands away from his bloodied face, which takes no effort as he's petrified with a fear that comes off him in waves by this point, and you inhale deeply to take in the scent of Karkat's blood, and

and

 _oh_

oh _God_

You had always been curious as to why he kept it a secret, and you'd always been eager for a chance to find out. But not like this. _Not like this._

Suddenly, you understand everything. _Everything_. _All_ of the things. Every last fucking one of them. Why he doesn't trust you, or Sollux, or any of his friends. Why he's so defensive. Why he hates himself so much.

Why this happened.

"Karkat. You... you blinded yourself on purpose. Didn't you."

That had to be what happened. This was no accident. His eyes had to have started changing color and he must have panicked. You realize with a start that _Sollux was right._

He's shaking and breathing so hard. His lusus stands by him, watching you carefully. You can't read beyond the horror in Karkat's expression; he never intended for you to discover this particular bit of information about him. He never intended _anyone_ to find out.

" _yes._ "

He manages to breathe the word. It's so quiet that you nearly miss it. "You hate me now, don't you." It's not a question. He says it like it's a foregone conclusion, as if there can be no other possibility.

"Karkat." His name is on your lips in a hushed whisper, because this new bit of information has left you otherwise speechless. You know his greatest secret now, one that could kill him if it got out. What did he ask? If you hated him now?

How could you _possibly_ hate this boy?

Your arms are around him before you even know what you're doing. He flinches (instinctively, you are certain now), unsure what to make of your gesture, before he gradually returns the hug. Maybe he's crying a bit. Maybe you are too. You honestly can't tell.

It occurs to you that this is why he's so angry all the time. He can't allow himself to cry, or blush, or be happy, or do anything that might out him. Anger is the only way he can express emotion that doesn't broadcast his status as a mutant to the world. That just makes you cling to him even harder.

You rub his back, hoping it'll help calm him down. Hoping it'll calm _you_ down. His candy red blood is probably staining your shoulder and you don't even care, it'll wash out and you brought extra shirts and none of that even matters right now.

"You don't..." He's trying to say something and he can't find the words. Maybe he can't bring himself to say it. He probably expected you to flip your shit, but you've never truly given a damn about the hemospectrum. Society would say his very existence is a crime, that he should be culled to prevent him from ever contaminating future generations, but you can't fault him for simply _existing_.

Maybe...

Maybe what is _lawful_ isn't always what is _right_.

Not that you ever considered abandoning him, but you _have_ to help him now.

"You don't have to stay here, if you don't want to," he finally manages to spit out. You smile at him, knowing full well he can't see it.

"I'll stay as long as you want me to. Do you want me to leave?" It's an honest question. You really will leave if he really does want you to.

Of course, you already know what his answer will be. "...No. I don't."

You take his hand and help him up, then sling his arm over your shoulder when he winces as he tries to put weight on his left leg.

"Come on. Let's get you cleaned up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is easily my favorite bit of this fic so far.


	6. Day 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the ghost in the shell discovers the situation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while! And by "a while" I mean "three months." Sorry about that. Real life kind of decided to shit everywhere for a while and for a long time I was pretty sure I was going to just straight-up scrap this pesterlog. But I figured out a way to salvage it, and it's much better than the original version for sure.
> 
> This is a _really_ short update, especially given how long it's been! But I will try to keep up, I promise. I won't let this story die! _Someone_ has to write Karkat/Terezi stories, after all

\-- apocalypseAverted [AA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

AA: please give karkat my c0nd0lences  
AA: i w0uld d0 s0 myself but he hasnt been 0n tr0llian f0r  
AA: a week n0w i think  
AA: i h0pe he is s0mething at least resembling well s00n   
GC: OH H3LL  
GC: WHO TOLD YOU? W4S 1T 3QU1US?  
GC: H3 PROM1S3D, D4MN1T  
GC: 1LL S33 H1M H4NG3D FOR TH1S  
GC: W41T NO H3D PROB4BLY 3NJOY TH4T   
AA: hehe pr0bably!  
AA: n0 equius h00ked me up t0 his grubt0p to upgrade my 0s  
AA: and i kind 0f accidentally scanned his entire hard drive  
AA: including his tr0llian l0gs   
GC: HOW DO YOU 3V3N 4CC1D3NT4LLY DO TH4T   
AA: terezi i am a gh0st inside 0f a r0b0t  
AA: i can pr0cess appr0ximately 10.25 TB 0f data per sec0nd but i 0nly have the reflexes and reacti0n time 0f a n0rmal tr0ll  
AA: its n0t like i meant 0r even wanted t0 sn00p ar0und his c0mputing device  
AA: d0 y0u have any idea h0w much digital musclebeast art that man has c0llected 0ver the sweeps  
AA: i kn0w m0re ab0ut the anat0my 0f th0se creatures n0w than i ever wanted t0 0_0   
GC: H4H4H4H4H4  
GC: TH3N 1 SUPPOS3 TH3 CR1M3 1TS3LF W1LL S3RV3 4S 1TS OWN PUN1SHM3NT  
GC: BUT 1 DONT L1K3 HOW 34SY 1T W4S TO 4CC3SS H1S LOGS  
GC: WH4T 1F SOM3ON3 H4CKS 1NTO TH3 D3V1C3 4ND F1NDS TH3M  
GC: 1 DONT L1K3 TH1S   
AA: d0nt w0rry, i havent t0ld any0ne else  
AA: n0r will i  
AA: and i deleted the l0gs 0nce i realized what they c0ntained s0 n0 0ne else will find them   
GC: 4LMOST 3V3RYON3 KNOWS NOW >:/  
GC: 4ND 1 D3F1N1T3LY DONT W4NT VR1SK4 TO KNOW  
GC: 1F 1 F1ND H3R SNOOP1NG 4ROUND H3R3 LOOK1NG FOR 4N 34SY M34L FOR H3R LUSUS, 1  
GC: 1 DONT KNOW WH4T 1LL DO  
GC: 1 DONT L1K3 TH1S 4R4D1A  
GC: 1 DONT L1K3 TH1S 4T 4LL  
GC: P3OPL3 K33P F1ND1NG OUT 4BOUT K4RK4T  
GC: 1TS SUPPOS3D TO B3 4 S3CR3T  
GC: 1TS MY R3SPONS1B1L1TY 4ND 1M B4R3LY 3V3N 1N CONTROL 4NYMOR3  
GC: 1 DONT W4NT H1M TO B3 CULL3D >:[   
AA: y0u care ab0ut him  
AA: 0f c0urse y0u w0uldnt want him culled  
AA: neither d0 i   
GC: 1M TRY1NG TO H3LP H1M  
GC: TRY1NG TO T34CH H1M HOW TO S33 L1K3 M3  
GC: BUT 1TS NOT WORK1NG 4ND W3R3 RUNN1NG OUT OF T1M3  
GC: 1 DONT KNOW WH4T 1M DO1NG WRONG   
AA: i wish i knew terezi  
AA: i h0pe y0u get thr0ugh t0 him  
AA: g00d luck   
GC: TH4NKS 4R4D1A

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling apocalypseAverted [AA] \--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you. _Really_ short. Also, hints at a backstory that I probably won't get into because when it comes right down to it, _I'm not that good of a writer_. I tend to overdo it a little when coming up with alternate timelines like this one, I've noticed!
> 
> I'm not gonna stop though, I will see this story through to its conclusion, I promise.


	7. Day 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which tempers flare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep swearing I'm going to finish this, and before I know it it's been a month since the last time I've posted a new chapter.
> 
> One day, this will be finished. Anyway! I think this part is as good as it's going to get. I've been looking at it for weeks now and I can't think of anything to add to it, and I figure that's probably a sign to just go ahead and post the damn thing.
> 
> So here it is!

>Terezi: Try something different.

"I thought we'd try something different today, Karkat, since this doesn't seem to be working."

"About damn time. I'm getting sick of filling my respiratory bladders with chalk dust."

When you went back to your hive for more supplies yesterday, you picked up something that you thought might help to jump-start the process of teaching Karkat. You'll have to wean him off them eventually, once he gets the hang of it, but with any luck, it'll help him with starting to associate colors with scents.

You pull out the pack of crayons and your notepad, and think for a second about what you want to draw, before deciding on a picture of Karkat. For an instant, you consider using the red crayon, but Karkat is understandably very sensitive about his blood color, and neither of you have brought it up again since you found out. You sketch a quick drawing of him with your grey crayon instead; messy hair, angry expression, nubby horns...

Blank, solid-color eyes. Whoops, you made yourself sad again.

You put the thought out of your mind. You're here to help him learn to cope with it, after all. You tear the page out of your notebook and hand it to him. "Here, tell me what this smells like."

He grabs the page from you and brings his face close to it before inhaling deeply. "Paper."

"You're holding it backwards."

"Oh. Shit, hold on." He turns the page around and sniffs it again. "Paper. And wax. This is stupid." He's about to crumple it up and toss it behind him when he hesitates for a moment.

"Wait, is that..." He brings it back up to his face again and lets the scent of the drawing linger in his olfactory chambers.

"Gunpowder. It's fucking _gunpowder_. Wait, does that mean I'm finally fucking doing it?" His face lights up for a moment, and you don't really want to tell him he's cheating, but it wouldn't be fair.

"No, sorry. I'm using my scented crayons. I... I thought it might help you put smells to colors."

"Oh. Okay" He can't hide his disappointment, but he tries. "Well, if you think this'll help me smell the world, I guess we've got no choice, right?"

He holds the drawing to his face again. You ask him, "What color is it?"

"...Black, I guess? Or maybe dark grey?"

"Right, grey. Now for the hard part: tell me what I drew."

He moves the sketch around, tilting, rotating, trying to figure it out. His nose runs along the lines of crayon on the page as he attempts to put the drawing in his mind's eye. "I think it's... it's a drawing of a troll. I think."

"Good! Who is it?"

"It's me, obviously. You wouldn't have drawn any of the others in grey."

You sigh at him. "No, you're supposed to tell from smelling the drawing! Forget it, we'll try another, okay?"

A knock at the door interrupts your teaching session.

>Sollux: Interrupt.

When Terezi opens the door to Karkat's hive, you open your mouth to speak but she quickly clamps her hand over your mouth. "I'm trying to teach him, don't say anything and give yourself away. Come in, though, I think you can help."

You don't get very far inside before Karkat greets you. "Hey, Sollux."

You exchange puzzled expressions with Terezi. "How did you know it was me?"

"It obviously wasn't Tavros, his footsteps clang so loudly I can't fucking hear myself think, and it wasn't Gamzee because that guy has the most irregular goddamn gait I've ever heard. You're the only other person who knows about me, so it had to be you."

Terezi takes a step back and faces the wall, grasping her arm behind her back. This is strange, even for her.

You have to ask. "...TZ? _Does_ anyone else know?" Her jaw drops as she mouths "SHUT. UP." at you silently.

"Oh for fuck's sake, who did you tell?" In any other situation, you might have gone along with her and let her explain, but understandably, you aren't exactly thinking clearly about this.

"Ha ha ha, you two are hilarious. Joke time's over now, right? Right?"

Neither you nor Terezi say anything. You are certain she's hiding something now. Karkat starts laughing nervously.

"Okay, you got me! You punked ol' Karkat pretty good there! Nice work, everybody, high fives all around!"

Silence.

"...oh my god. You told someone. This is not a drill, this is an actual goddamn bona-fide breach of fucking security."

Karkat inhales sharply through his nostrils. "Let's take fucking stock of this situation and pray to whatever horrible deity might be listening that it _isn't_ going down the load gaper as fast as I think it might be. Who knows about my blindness, Terezi?"

"...Nepeta," she replies. "But that wasn't my fault, she grilled Tavros and he caved under the pressure." You're pretty sure this is okay. Nepeta is unlikely to do anything that could end in Karkat being culled.

"Okay. Okay," Karkat responds. "Not a big deal. Unless--- fuck. Terezi." He faces Terezi, fear still clearly visible in his blind eyes. "She didn't tell Equius, did she?"

"No," she responds.

You breathe a sigh of relief.

"... _I_ did."

Wait, _what?!_ " _Equius_ knows?!"

"Oh shut up, Sollux, you were all for telling him first thing when we found Karkat like this!" she retorts.

"Yeah but KK obviously didn't want me to, so I fucking _didn't_! Jegus, TZ!"

"Shit. I might as well fucking kill myself now and save myself some time," Karkat remarks between bouts of panic. "Goddamnit, Terezi, this isn't good!"

"It's totally not a big deal, I promise. Aradia and Nepeta--"

"You told _Aradia_ , too?!" Karkat interrupts. "What, did you just open a memo called EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT, KARKAT BLIND AS A FUCKING FLYING SQUEAKBEST and call everyone in?"

"...Like I was saying, they won't tell anyone, and I kind of bullied Equius into secrecy. Though I'd rather not have to do that again anytime soon, ugh." She shudders a bit at remembering it.

"That's bullshit, TZ! The first time anyone asks him about it, that sweaty asshole's gonna drop the ball and you know it!" You cannot believe she is not more upset about this.

"Equius is the last fucking person I wanted to know about this, except maybe fucking _Vriska_. How the hell can you be so calm about this?"

"He would have found out eventually, you know Nepeta can't keep anything from him. Actually, you should probably thank her, because she got him to start working on a set of prosthetic eyes. And before you start ranting about _that_ , she said they were for _me_ , so at least she's trying to help!"

"A lot of fucking good it's doing! At this rate, half of Alternia is gonna know by this time tomorrow!" He gets up and starts pacing, and somehow manages to avoid smacking into any walls.

"I'm as good as culled. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Why the hell did I think this was ever a good idea?"

"Getting help, or blinding yourself in the first place? Because staring at the sun like an idiot was stupid, but I'm starting to think trying to help you is a fucking waste of time!"

You aren't sure how to respond to that. "You... wait... KK did this to _himself_?"

Karkat has this look on his face, it's something like horror and anger and shock all at once. "What. The Fuck. Did you just say. I trusted you, goddamnit! What the hell, Terezi, _what the hell?!_ "

"You... you said it was an accident."

"Not now, Sollux, I can't take your useless ass breaking down after all of this, too."

"KK, why? Why would you do something like that?" Then the realization hits you. "Oh. Oh no."

"Sollux, don't, I swear if you--"

"No no, this is all my fault, I was angry and I said--"

"Damnit man, we have bigger problems to worry about than you being depressed about shit you've said! Which, by the way, spoiler alert: _didn't fucking matter_ because I would have done it anyway, so shut the hell up and help me figure out how I'm going to get out of this."

"Oh, _now_ you want my help, after deciding to take a joke completely seriously was a good idea! It's always about _you_ and _your_ problems, _isn't it, KK?_ I see how it is!"

"This time, yeah, it kind of _is_ , because _I can't fucking see_ , bulgeprince! Now they've got _two_ reasons to cull me. See that?! TWO. I did that just for you! I figured that'd be right up your fucking alley, nookmunch!"

"Oh my God, what am I doing?" You cannot believe you're being such a jerk about this.

As you pace and lament about being twice the shithead Karkat ever was or will be, he leans against a wall before slumping down against it and addressing Terezi. "Why not just fucking tell him about my blood, too? Why not just fucking skip telling everyone and cull me right the fuck now and get it over with? I've got a few sickles in my respiteblock, pick one and be done with it!"

"Do it yourself," she answers coldly. "You clearly don't want me here anymore. I'm through with helping you."

Before either of you can say anything to stop her, she walks to the door, exits Karkat's hive, and slams the door behind her. You are too stunned to continue feeling sorry for yourself.

Neither of you speak again for a while.

You're in the middle of picking up the art supplies Terezi left behind when Karkat breaks the silence. "I really fucked that one up, didn't I?"

"Yep, I'd say so, KK."

" _Fffffffffuuuuuuuuuuck._ Maybe I deserve to be culled. Clearly I have no business being part of society."

"Don't _say_ that, KK. We'll figure something out. Maybe EQ will come through, or maybe if we can get FF in power quick enough it won't even be a problem anymore."

"Well, excuse me if I decide not to hope for a shitty deus ex machina to get me out of this one." He decaptchalogues his husktop and sets it on his lap.

"Get your bifurcated ass over here and help me get on Trollian. I've got to fix this mess."

(Later.)

>Terezi: Fume.

You wipe your eyes again and try to rationalize giving up. Maybe if you keep at it long enough, you can convince yourself that what you did was right.

Stupid Karkat. Stupid fucking _Karkat_. Who the hell does that jerk think he is? You've been there trying to help him to keep him from getting his stupid ass culled, and he just yells at you.

Yeah, you told Equius, but you were trying to make the best of a bad situation, and if he can help and save Karkat's life, isn't that a good thing?

No, you know what? Fuck Karkat. Guy's a douche. You'd be better off without him.

Right?

Fuck, what are you saying? You don't want anything bad to happen to him. You definitely don't want the empire to kill him. You don't think you could live with yourself if he were culled because you didn't help him. He's your friend, and a damn good one. Yeah, he's a total bulge sometimes, but you do really like him, because...

Why? You used to think he was interesting because there was that air of mystery about him, that secret of his that he guarded with his life that you just _had_ to know. But you know what that is now. What's so intriguing about Karkat now?

It suddenly dawns on you that he _let_ you leave. You know his secret, he knew you were furious with him, and he did nothing to try to stop you. Maybe he trusts you that much? But why would he?

Oh, of course. You didn't reject him when you found out. In fact, you probably reacted better than he'd ever dared to hope. And holy shit, did _that_ particular revelation ever shed some light on why he is like he is.

What is this? It's been maybe a few hours since your fight, and already you've mentally forgiven him. You really do care about him. He is your friend after all.

Maybe... maybe more than that?

Is this what kismesitude feels like? But you don't hate him. You don't think you _could_ hate Karkat Vantas, at this point.

Maybe you're falling into pity with him?

 _You pity Karkat._ You certainly hadn't expected to come to that conclusion when you stormed out of his hive.

You definitely can't give up on him now. But he probably doesn't want to see you again, after everything that just happened. You really fucked this one up, didn't you?

You'll have to figure this one out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end of what I had written already and am just proofreading and editing based off the suggestions of my proofreaders. Two more chapters and I'll be writing entirely fresh material. I will try to keep the time between chapters from stretching out into months.
> 
> By the way, props to lantadyme for proofreading the latest revision, even if it was forever ago, and to cephied_variable for taking a look at one of the EARLIEST revisions. You have no idea how bad this story was before they took a look at it.


	8. Day 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Karkat seeks assistance from a certain jade-blooded friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I meant to get around to editing and posting this sooner than I did, but
> 
> real life keeps happening
> 
> at least this time it was something really good :D

>Karkat: Enlist aid.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

CG: KANAYA? ARE YOU THERE?  
CG: HELLO?  
CG: FUCK  
CG: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE LAST THREE DAYS?  
CG: I NEED YOUR HELP. I FUCKED UP AND DID *TWO* INCREDIBLY STUPID THINGS AND I CAN'T FIX THEM BY MYSELF.  
CG: AND YOU'RE NOT EVEN THERE AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN YOU'LL EVER BE BACK  
CG: GODDAMNIT, WHY DO I EVEN TRY.  
GA: Sorry Karkat I Am Here  
GA: Ive Been Rather Busy Lately  
GA: Please Accept My Apologies  
GA: I Would Have Come As Soon As I Heard My Computing Device Beeping But I Have A Guest And Ive Been Tending To Her Injuries  
GA: She Has Several Cuts And Scrapes  
GA: Not To Mention A Rather Bad Case Of Sunburn From Travelling Through The Desert Surrounding My Hive  
CG: OKAY. GIVE ME A MINUTE.  
CG: FUCK, THIS DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT.  
CG: VRISKA CAN NEVER KNOW WHAT I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU, OKAY?  
GA: Karkat You Know You Can Trust Me Right  
GA: I Mean I Cannot Help You Unless You Tell Me What The Problem Is  
GA: Vriska May Be My Moirail But You Are A Close Friend Of Mine  
GA: I Promise I Shall Keep Whatever Is Bothering You Between Us  
CG: NO I  
CG: I KNOW  
CG: I MEAN FUCK, YOU'RE PROBABLY THE SANEST OUT OF ALL OF US.  
CG: I'M NOT SAYING I DON'T TRUST YOU. I KNOW YOU WON'T TELL HER.  
CG: I GUESS I'M JUST BEING PARANOID. THIS IS SOME HEAVY SHIT, OKAY?  
CG: THE LAST THING I NEED IS TO STARE DOWN THE JAWS OF THAT GODDAMNED SPIDER.  
CG: WELL METAPHORICALLY ANYWAY  
CG: SEEING HOW I CAN'T VERY WELL FUCKING SEE ANYMORE.  
CG: HAHAHA DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?  
CG: OH FUCKING HELL, CULL ME NOW.  
GA: What Do You Mean  
GA: Karkat  
GA: What Happened  
GA: Are You Ok  
CG: NO  
CG: I'M REALLY NOT  
CG: I CAN'T FUCKING SEE. SOLLUX IS HERE, HELPING MY STUPID BLIND SELF DO THINGS LIKE CHAT ON TROLLIAN AND NOT FALL DOWN THE GODDAMN STAIRS.  
CG: TEREZI WAS HELPING ME, TOO. THE KEY WORD HERE IS "WAS", BECAUSE I RUINED EVERYTHING BY BEING A RAGING SHITHEEL AND NOW SHE'S MAD AT ME AND MY BEST CHANCE OF MAKING IT OUT OF THIS UNCULLED IS GONE.  
CG: I AM SO UTTERLY SCREWED AND I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE.  
CG: WHY AM I EVEN TELLING YOU ALL OF THIS  
CG: IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'LL BE ABLE TO DO ANYTHING.  
CG: AND IF VRISKA FINDS OUT THEN I WON'T EVEN HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE DRONES  
CG: I'LL JUST FUCKING MARCH MYSELF OFF A CLIFF AND INTO THE THING'S THROAT I GUESS.  
CG: FORGET I SAID ANYTHING.  
CG: SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.  
GA: Wait  
GA: Dont Go  
GA: Karkat Of Course I Will Help You  
GA: Please Tell Me You Are Still There  
CG: no, he left.  
CG: or triied two.  
CG: he2 ju2t kiind of 2macked intwo the wall and cur2ed hiim2elf before fiinally makiing hi2 way down2taiir2.  
CG: waiit, hold on for two 2econd2.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] logged off --

\-- twinArmageddons [TA] logged on --

\-- twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

TA: there we go.  
GA: Is He Really Blind Sollux  
TA: ye2, he wa2n't kiiddiing about that.  
TA: and he really diid pii22 off tz 2omethiing fiierce.  
TA: 2he 2tayed here wiith hiim, ii dont thiink 2he even left hii2 hiive after we found hiim liike thii2.  
TA: tz wa2 goiing two teach hiim how two 2ee agaiin or 2ome 2hiit. ii don't really under2tand quiite how 2he doe2 iit but 2he wanted two teach kk how two do iit two.  
TA: but they had a fiight and 2he left a few day2 ago.  
TA: and 2he ha2n't been back or talked two eiither of u2 onliine 2ince, eiither.  
TA: kk won't talk two her becau2e he thiinks maybe 2he was riight two giive up on hiim  
TA: and ii gue22 he doe2n't want two 2addle her wiith hi2 bull2hiit.  
TA: but  
TA: kk ii2 my be2t friiend  
TA: and ii don't have a chance iin hell of helpiing hiim before the patrol2.  
GA: Should I Come Over  
TA: that would be niice, ii need two me22 wiith my lu2u2 2oon.  
TA: and ii don't want two leave kk here by him2elf.  
TA: he 2wear2 he'll be alriight but  
TA: you know  
TA: he'2 fuckiing bliind riight now.  
GA: Oh But I Have A Guest And  
GA: I Do Not Think I Am At Liberty To Discuss Why But I Do Not Think It Would Be Prudent To Leave Her Here By Herself  
GA: She Has A Very Good Reason To Not Want To Be Alone  
GA: So It Appears I Cannot Assist In Person Unless You Want Me To Drag Along An Injured Troll As Well  
GA: I Do Not Like Feeling This  
GA: Powerless  
GA: To Help Karkat In His Time Of Need  
TA: maybe you could get tz two talk two you, kn?  
TA: 2he won't re2pond two any of our me22age2 but maybe 2he would talk two you.  
GA: Oh  
GA: Of Course  
GA: I Hadnt Thought Of That  
GA: Please Take Care Of Him Sollux  
GA: I Will Do What I Can  
TA: thank2, kn.

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA] \--

>Kanaya: Auspisticize.

No way, there's nothing particularly ashen regarding what you're about to do, it's just a bit of platonic mediation. Believe it or not, there is a difference! And in any case, you doubt your friends' hatred for one another runs quite that deep, if indeed it exists at all.

You should probably get on with it instead of trying to rationalize it to yourself, though.

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC] \--

GA: Hello Terezi  
GC: TH1S 1S 4BOUT K4RK4T  
GC: 1SNT 1T  
GA: Um  
GC: DONT B3 SURPR1S3D  
GC: 1M NOT  
GC: 1 TH1NK 1F H3D H4D 4 CHO1C3 4T TH3 B3G1NN1NG H3 WOULD H4V3 TOLD YOU  
GC: 4ND PROB4BLY ONLY YOU  
GA: Terezi  
GC: H3H3 1TS OK4Y  
GC: 1 KNOW K4RK4T TOO W3LL  
GC: 4ND  
GC: 1 C4NT S4Y 1 BL4M3 H1M >:[  
GA: How Do You Mean  
GA: ?  
GC: W3LL  
GC: 1F YOUR3 T4LK1NG TO M3 4BOUT K4RK4T NOW  
GC: H3 MUST H4V3 TOLD YOU H1MS3LF 4BOUT WH4T H4PP3N3D TO H1M  
GA: Yes He Did Explain His Rather Extraordinary Circumstances  
GA: Not The Particulars  
GA: But He Did Tell Me Of His Newfound Disability  
GC: W3LL TH3N  
GC: H3 PROB4BLY 4LSO TOLD YOU 4BOUT HOW 1 GOT M4D 4T H1M 4ND STORM3D OUT WH3N H3 H4D 4 P3RF3CTLY GOOD R34SON TO B3 4NGRY W1TH M3  
GC: 4ND HOW 1 PR3TTY MUCH M4D3 4N 4SS OF MYS3LF  
GA: Eh  
GA: Not So Much About That No  
GC: W3LL 1TS TRU3  
GC: 4ND 1V3 TR13D TO T4LK TO H1M S1NC3 TH3N  
GC: BUT 1 C4NT BR1NG MYS3LF TO 4CTU4LLY S3ND TH3 M3SS4G3  
GC: 1 G4V3 UP ON H1M WH3N H3 N33D3D M3 MOST K4N4Y4  
GC: TH3R3S NO W4Y H3 W4NTS TO H34R FROM M3 DUR1NG TH3 L1TTL3 T1M3 H3 H4S L3FT >:[  
GA: What Do You Mean By  
GA: Gave Up On Him  
GC: YOU KNOW HOW 1 L34RN3D TO G3T 4ROUND MY BL1NDN3SS, R1GHT  
GC: 1 W4NT3D TO T34CH K4RK4T HOW TO DO TH3 S4M3  
GC: BUT 1T W4SNT GO1NG SO W3LL  
GC: SO MUCH T1M3 W4ST3D 4ND W3 M4D3 SO L1TTL3 PROGR3SS  
GC: NOTH1NG W4S WORK1NG 4ND 1 DONT G3T 1T  
GC: 1 WAS TRY1NG TO DO 1T TH3 S4M3 W4Y 1 L34RN3D BUT 1T W4SNT WORK1NG  
GA: How Did You Learn Anyway  
GC: MY LUSUS T4UGHT M3  
GA: You Mean The One That Has Yet To Hatch  
GC: Y3S!  
GC: SH3 T4UGHT M3 TH4T IF YOUR 3Y3S DONT WORK, YOU H4V3 TO R3W1R3 YOUR OTH3R S3NS3S TO M4K3 UP FOR 1T  
GC: SO 1NST34D OF US1NG MY 3Y3S TO S33  
GC: 1 US3 MY NOS3 1NST34D  
GC: 3V3RY COLOR H4S 4 SC3NT 4ND FL4VOR 1F YOU R34LLY TRY TO F1ND 1T  
GC: 1TS JUST TH4T MOST TROLLS DONT, OR N3V3R N33D TO  
GC: BUT 3V3N THOUGH W3 PR4CT1C3D 3V3RY D4Y, K4RK4T JUST COULDNT G3T 1T  
GA: Hmmmmmm  
GA: How Did It All Begin For You  
GC: 1 TOLD YOU  
GC: TH3 N1GHT 4FT3R 1 W4S BL1ND3D MY LUSUS T4LK3D TO M3 1N MY DR34MS  
GC: 4ND TOLD M3 WH4T 1 H4D TO DO TO M4K3 UP FOR LOS1NG MY V1S1ON  
GA: And That Was It  
GA: ?  
GC: WH4T 4R3 YOU G3TT1NG 4T >:?  
GA: I Do Not Mean To Sound Rude But  
GA: Being Able To Substitute Smell For Sight Doesnt Seem Like Something One Can Simply Train Themselves To Do Regardless Of The Levels Of Effort Involved  
GA: Perhaps  
GA: Do You Think Its Possible That Something Your Lusus Did Was The Catalyst For Your Ability  
GC: !!!  
GC: K4N4Y4 YOUR3 4 G3N1US  
GC: WHY D1DNT 1 TH1NK OF TH4T  
GC: BL4R 1TS 4LL SO OBV1OUS NOW  
GC: 1 H4V3 TO T4LK TO K4RK4T NOW  
GC: 4ND G3T H1M TO COM3 OV3R SOMEHOW  
GC: H3 C4N B3 M4D 4T M3 4LL H3 L1K3S  
GC: BUT 1F TH1S WORKS 1TLL B3 TOT4LLY WORTH 1T  
GC: TH4NKS K4N4Y4  
GA: It Was Nothing I Assure You

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

You lean back and bask in the glow of your handiwork. Even if it was completely accidental, you feel pretty good about this turn of events. You start to stand up to go back to tending to your wounded guest when your computer beeps again.

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

GC: c3<

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] \--

Oh, come _on_.

>Terezi: Make amends.

You aren't sure if you can. Not over Trollian, anyway. No, this seems like the sort of thing you ought to do in person. But you have to get him here somehow. Might as well troll him directly, it's not like he can read it if he's by himself, and at least that way you're sure you'll get whoever's staying with him at the moment.

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

You cannot do it. You cannot talk to Karkat. You can't, _you can't_. He's definitely still mad at you and you're just going to make things worse.

No, stop thinking like that. You _must_. If he is to survive the next patrol, you have to, for his sake.

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

GC: K4RK4T  
GC: OR SOLLUX OR G4MZ33 OR WHO3V3R 1S 4CTU4LLY R34D1NG TH1S  
GC: BR1NG K4RK4T TO MY H1V3 TOMORROW  
GC: 1LL T3LL YOU WH4TS GO1NG ON WH3N YOU G3T H3R3  
GC: DO WH4T3V3R YOU H4V3 TO TO M4K3 H1M GO  
GC: TH1S 1S 3XTR3M3LY 1MPORT4NT, 1TS TH3 ON3 TH1NG 1 C4N TH1NK OF TH4T C4N H3LP H1M FOR SUR3  
GC: 4ND  
GC: 1M SORRY  
GC: FOR W4LK1NG OUT ON H1M, 1 M34N  
GC: DONT T3LL H1M TH4T THOUGH  
GC: 1 W4NT TO T3LL H1M, 1 M34N 1 W1LL T3LL H1M  
GC: L4T3R  
GC: ONC3 1 S33 H1M 1N P3RSON 4G41N  
GC: S33 YOU H3R3, BOTH OF YOU  
GC: 1 HOP3 >:[

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stick around for the mini-chapter immediately after this!


	9. Day 13.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kanaya's guest wakes up.

>Be Kanaya's guest.

Your eyes slowly flutter open, your body still reeling from the events of the last day or so. At least, you _think_ it's been that long. Being unconcious tends to ruin one's perception of time.

You briefly panic a little once you realize you are in unfamiliar surroundings. For a fleeting moment, you are completely unsure as to your location, and you wonder if someone managed to capture you while you were passed out.

You realize your enemies would probably opt to simply kill you instead, around the same time you figure out where you are. The room you are in is strangely familiar, and then it hits you, you have been here before.

Kanaya Maryam. Of course. She's the only one crazy enough to live out in the desert.

You swing your legs over the side of the recuperacoon and wobble a bit before finding your footing. You take a look at yourself; your face, chest, and most of your left arm are covered in an unsightly burn that stings to the touch. Most of your cuts have not yet healed, and are still painful. You carefully towel off the slime and discover your clothes folded neatly in a chair by the recuperacoon.

>Guest: Find Kanaya.

If you remember the layout of Kanaya's hive, you remember her respiteblock being directly above where you are now. She should probably know you're awake and able to walk, so you decide finding her would be for the best.

Her door is open. You call for her, and again, but get no response. You enter her respiteblock; the windows are open and her computing device is still on. You can see her tending to her plants outside.

Oh well, you can talk to her later. Might as well use her computer. You need to see if you've still got any allies left, and if you do, whether or not they're available. You haven't forgotten the trouble that led to your current predicament, after all.

Looks like Miss Maryam forgot to sign out of Trollian.

>Guest: Snoop.

You can't resist taking a look at the recent logs.

CG: VRISKA CAN NEVER KNOW WHAT I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU, OKAY?

Oh, a secret! Those are always fun--

CG: SEEING HOW I CAN'T VERY WELL FUCKING SEE ANYMORE.

Oh.

Oh _wow_. That is... kind of a sort of huge deal. Karkat is _blind_ now?

Your mind immediately suggests a terrible course of action. But you _know_ Karkat. You can't do that, he's your friend, in a sort of black way. And he's under Terezi's protection, too. There's no way.

But they're not speaking now. If you move quick enough...

No, you can't. That's horrible, that's despicable, even for _you_. The Marquise has never slain anyone who at least stood a fighting chance of defending themselves. There is no question, this is playing dirty. If you do this, there's no going back.

But if you don't, there's no way you can ever go back home, because you can't placate her without providing her a solid meal now. And if you can't go back home, your enemies will certainly slaughter you, and God knows you've made so many of _those_ over the sweeps that losing _her_ protection is not something you can afford right now.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Your mind is made up.

You are VRISKA SERKET, and to placate your lusus, you are going to kidnap Karkat Vantas.


	10. Day 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Terezi enacts her last-ditch plan to save Karkat.

>Karkat: Refuse to go along with Terezi's shenanigans.

"No."

"Wait, KK, you mean--"

"Yeah, we're going. Come on."

Part of you is surprised he's this eager to see her again. Karkat has always tried to salvage his pride when he could, even when there's nothing left of it. But on the other hand, perhaps even _he_ recognizes that his very survival may depend on Terezi.

When you came back to his hive, after going back to your own hivestem, he immediately led you to his husktop and demanded to know who's been messaging him since yesterday and what the contents of said messages were. You rolled your eyes, checked it for him, and resolved to write a text-to-speech grub module for him later. When you said it was Terezi, asking him to come to her hive, his eyes instinctively widened.

You told him he didn't have to do this. There had to be another way, a sure thing instead of relying on what you amounted to a total crapshoot, like maybe NP really _could_ keep EQ in check and make him design a pair of robot eyes.

He simply insisted that he had to try.

Now you're leading him through the surrounding forest on foot, steering him away from the musclebeast hunting grounds, guiding him to the blind girl's tree hive. Karkat doesn't know she wants to apologize, as you decided to go with her request to not tell him _that_ particular bit of her message, but you're starting to think he might actually beat her to it.

>Sollux and Karkat: Meet with Terezi.

She takes a careful step from behind a nearby tree as you and Karkat pass by her hive's elevator. She approaches quietly, slowly, deliberately. She wants to do this on her own terms, so you decide against calling out to her and alerting Karkat to her presence.

Not that her attempt at stealth stops him. She takes a step and his head tilts upward, immediately aware of her.

"Terezi."

"You came." She says it in a hushed tone, almost a whisper, barely audible from where you stand and like she can't believe he's here. Obviously, Terezi hadn't expected Karkat to actually come.

She breaks the silence a moment later. "Come on, you two. We have to try this."

You and Karkat follow her deeper into the forest, having some slight difficulty in keeping up, because she knows the way to wherever you're going by heart, and you are trying to lead your blind friend through strange territory. The clearing isn't that far from Terezi's hive, though, so you and Karkat aren't too far behind when you find it.

You're kind of speechless when you first take a look at it. It's just like Terezi described it to you sweeps ago, but until now, you weren't sure if her story was the entire truth; just how would a lususless wriggler make it out of the caverns by herself, anyway? You thought it had to be something she made up to make herself sound tougher. But even the broken mother grub skull lying on the ground next to the oversized egg and destroyed scale (you'd thought that scale was just another creepy story bored wrigglers tossed around on the Alternet, but...) suggests she was telling the truth about what happened the same night your computer exploded last sweep.

You shake your head and focus on the matter at hand. If Terezi hadn't been lying about her lusus after all, if she has really gone her entire life with her lusus not even having been born yet, then maybe she was telling the truth about it teaching her to taste colors from within the egg. And if _that's_ true...

Suddenly, you understand what she's going to try.

>Terezi: Lead Karkat to the egg.

You take Karkat's hand and utter a single word. "Come."

He doesn't say anything, simply allowing you to guide him. His hand is warm in yours and maybe you're blushing a bit but you have to try this, and the sooner, the better.

"Where are we going?" he finally manages to ask.

"To my lusus," you answer.

"You mean the one that never hatched?"

"Yeah. If anyone can help you, it's her."

"But--- _oh._ " And now, you think, he _gets it_.

When you went blind, your unborn lusus, once she shook off Tavros's and ultimately Vriska's control, immediately telepathically contacted you, guiding you back to the safety of your hive and teaching you what you needed to do to make up for your lost sight. She helped you master an alternate way of observing the world around you. However, clearly you are far more susceptible to psychic suggestion than Karkat is; you have your suspicions as to why, and all of them have to do with his irregular blood. If your lusus is to aid him, you must do what you can to decrease the burden on her.

Your grip on Karkat's hand loosens, as you give him an instruction. "Touch it."

"Touch _what?_ "

"The egg. She's still not born yet, remember?"

"Oh. Right. Wait, what good is this going to do?"

"Just trust me, this has got to work!"

"...alright."

And then he does, and then he _gasps_ , and then your face lights up like a wriggler's on Twelfth Perigree's Eve, because you know that sense of relief, that feeling that you've _finally_ turned a corner and everything just might turn out all right after all.

>Karkat: Suddenly be endowed with the ability to taste and smell colors.

When you place the palm of your hand on the smooth eggshell, you don't really expect it to work. Nothing else has so far, why would this? But as your skin makes contact with the egg, something happens within your own mind that you can't quite explain. The background noise that you suddenly realize has been there ever since you and Sollux stepped into the forest grows louder, filling your mind with static until you think you might scream, before it suddenly stops.

You try to steady yourself. A picture of _something_ starts to form in your mind's eye, but it's hazy, and too many pieces are missing. You suddenly feel compelled to take a deep breath.

When you do so, it is kind of overwhelming, to say the least. A cacophony of aromas assault your palette all at once, making it difficult to concentrate. The strawberry bubblegum pink and cotton candy blue of the treetops, the charcoal grey of the smashed mother grub skull fragments, the licorice black and just a hint of wild berry teal of Terezi's shirt, the _holy shit wait a minute it actually worked_

This is... kind of _incredible_.

You sniff the air; the scent of licorice grows stronger as she approaches.

"Karkat?" she whispers.

"It worked," you breathe in response.

Terezi inhales sharply, the remnants of whatever else she might have said dying in her throat as she takes slow steps toward you. Carefully, unsure of herself, she comes nearer, stopping just in front of you. "Karkat," she repeats, as she slowly leans into you, your back pressed against the egg. At this distance you can, only _just_ , catch the scent of her blood. Under her smoky grey skin flows a teal that kind of smells like Berry Punch Beatdown Fruit Trollups.

It conflicts a little, but as her arms circle around you, you decide it's something you could probably get used to.

"I'm sorry." Both of you blurt out your awkward apologies at the same time, like it's a stupid scene from one of your stupid movies.

"I shouldn't have been such a whiny bulge, you were just trying to help. I mean, nobody's tried to kill me yet so you must have done something right."

"I shouldn't have given up. Not when you needed me."

And just like that, the two of you fall silent again. Her head rests on your chest and you think to yourself, after everything that happened, that she would waste her time on you is nothing short of amazing. Of all the trolls on Alternia, she chose to be stuck with _you_.

If that's not pitiful, what is?

"Come on, now that you can do it, I need to teach you how to use it!"

As Terezi takes your arm and leads you away from the lusus egg, you catch a whiff of mustard yellow. Oh right, Sollux. That guy was here the entire time, watching your embarassing emotional display. What a jerk that guy is. Couldn't he give you and Terezi a little privacy?

Unfortunately, that train of thought ends when that yellow is the last color you smell.

All at once, your mind's eye goes dark as your newfound ability to sense the world is suddenly silenced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, we've reached the end of old material to revise. Everything from here on out is 100% fresh text! But that's okay because I kind of figured out how the rest of the story is going to go. I shouldn't have TOO much more to go so hopefully I can wrap this up soon. It's been fun, definitely the longest I've ever worked on... well, pretty much anything, really! I have no idea why this seems to be my highest-rated story, if kudos and views are anything to go on, but thanks to everyone who checked it out and liked it for checking it out and liking it.
> 
> I'll try not to take forever to write the next chapter, promise!


	11. Day 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a confession is made.

>Karkat: Exposit.

One week ago, Terezi led you to her unborn lusus, in a final, desperate attempt to help you get around your blindness the same way she had.

It didn't work.

You blacked out, your mind unprepared to handle such a sudden severing of the connection between itself and Terezi's lusus, or at least that's what you think. None of you, not you or Terezi or Sollux, are quite sure what happened, though Terezi thinks it might have happened when you broke physical contact with the egg.

Sollux and Terezi dragged your unconcious form back to her hive, where you've stayed since. If it hadn't been for Sollux's telekinesis, he's been sure to let you know, this would have been no easy feat. When you finally woke the next day, you were just as blind as you ever were. Sniffing the air produced no explosion of color in your mind's eye.

You were too disappointed to even swear in an irritated matter about that.

Terezi has been... surprisingly calm, you think, is the best way to describe it. Outside of a talk with Sollux while you were just waking up, she hasn't mentioned it at all. You aren't sure if it's because she doesn't want to remind you, or because she wants to forget.

She began trying to teach you her second sight within hours of you regaining consciousness, against Sollux's protests ("Please, TZ, he needs to rest a bit," he pleaded with her in another block. "There's no time, we have to pick up where we left off," she countered). She has used every trick she's ever tried, and a few new ones, to try to trigger the enhanced senses that she believes with every fiber of her being are within a hair's breadth of being unlocked in you.

Not one of her attempts so far has succeeded.

>Karkat: Try again.

She is trying the scented crayons again now. Terezi opens the pack, and quickly sketches something on her notepad before replacing the crayon, picking a new one, flipping to the next page and drawing something else. She does this twice before setting the notepad in your lap.

"Okay. Tell me what the first page smells like, and try to figure out what I drew."

The first page smells like lemons; you trace the wax lines with your fingertips and follow their scent. "It's, um, one of your scalemates, I think. Or something like it."

"Alright, good," she replies. "Now try the second page."

You inhale sharply, the pad to your face, and frown. This drawing doesn't have a smell. Terezi must be trying to wean you off the scented crayons, but if you can barely discern things _with_ them, what chance do you stand of identifying anything without them?

Still, you try, more for her sake than yours. You run your fingers across the smooth surface of the paper, seeking out her sketch's form. You find the crayon trail and follow the marks, tracing out the picture in your head.

"I think... I think it's my sickle? Or some kind of hook?"

"Right, it's your weapon. Now, tell me what it smells like," she asks.

You sigh. There's no way, but you lift the notepad to your face and try again. You inhale deeply and widen your olfactory receptors, hoping that maybe, this time, you'll get the result you're looking for.

But all you smell is paper and wax. "Nothing," you tell Terezi.

She swears under her breath, and you think you hear her sniffle a little but she rips the pad from your hand and starts furiously scribbling another drawing.

"Terezi?" She doesn't reply. "Terezi? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she responds, with some hesitation.

"Nothing, my ass. I've been hanging around you too long lately to buy that. What's up?"

Another sniff. You think she's probably trying to get a read on you until it occurs to you that she might be-- oh. _Oh._

"Hey, are you okay?!"

"I'm fine!" She thrusts the notepad back into your hands. "Tell me what's on the first page."

"Tell me what's bothering you," you reply.

"Tell me what's on the first page!" she says, her voice raised.

"Look, Terezi, I know something's wrong, alright? I've been around you too fucking long to not catch shit like this. What's the problem?"

"Nothing! Damnit, Karkat, check the drawing I just gave you, we have... we have to... we don't have much time, alright? I have to teach you and we have to be quick about it, so please, just try to concentrate, okay?"

"Look," you say, remembering what happened the last time you were angry with her. "Something's bothering you, I can fucking feel it. Tell me, what's wrong?"

She sniffs again; not because, now you are certain, she's trying to sense her surroundings but because she simply can't help it. "Sollux... he said, he said the patrols are coming sooner than he thought. They're going to be here five days earlier, and, and, that means there's even _less_ time now, and, I already wasted so much of it getting mad and not being able to do it right and then there's the whole thing with my lusus, and now she won't or can't even talk to me anymore and I think trying to bring you to her might have _hurt_ her somehow, and I just... Karkat, please... just try to... to..."

She stands up, choking on her words, and quickly leaves the room. Her footsteps pound upstairs, all the way to her respiteblock, where she slams the door shut. Normally, you would leave her to herself. Normally. But something is very, very wrong with Terezi, and you think leaving her alone may not be such a good idea. You carefully feel your way to the stairs, and then, ear pressed to the wall, make your way to her respiteblock.

When you hear it, you knock on her without even thinking, and immediately she stops. She's trying to put on a brave face for you, and it hurts, knowing that, essentially, this is all your fault.

"Terezi? Fuck, I'm sorry, can we... can we talk?"

You can make out the slow footsteps as she approaches the door and hesitates, debating with herself, before the knob turns and the door opens.

She silently stands there for a moment. "Terezi, what's g--" is as far as you get before she practically throws herself into you, her arms looping around your back. You stagger, throw your hands up and take a step back, half out of being thrown off balance and half out of surprise.

"Karkat, I... I can't..." She is struggling against herself, and losing.

"What's wrong?" you answer.

"It's all my fault, if I'd just tried harder, or if-- if I hadn't given up on you, or if I'd... if I'd..."

"Terezi, no, it's okay--"

"No, it's not okay!" she interrupts. "I quit when you needed me most because I got mad over something _stupid_ and now... oh my god, Karkat, it's all my fault, I can't believe..." She is unable to finish her sentence, her words falling into open sobs.

Your brain finally comprehending the situation, you lower your arms and hold Terezi closer to you in an effort to comfort her. You aren't sure you're doing a very good job, but you have to try.

"Fuck, don't blame yourself, you didn't do this." you tell her. "You didn't make me stare into the sun, or decide my blood should be this shitty, awful color. You... you fucking _tried_ to help me, and haha, shit, that was more than I did for myself."

You take a deep breath and sigh.

"If they cull me, I probably deserve it, because past me was a complete, utter _moron_."

Welp. That was completely the wrong thing to say. Terezi just starts crying harder.

"No, no, no, Karkat, it's not fair, I can't... oh my god, Karkat!" She clings to you, muttering incomprehensively. Now you've gone and done it. Now you probably really _do_ deserve to be culled, just for that.

"Terezi, you--"

"You shouldn't be killed, you didn't do anything wrong! This isn't right, this isn't _justice!_ You don't deserve this, you deserve better and I--- I can't just---" Her speech devolves back into sobbing as she buries her face in your chest.

You simply hold her, silently, standing in the doorframe.

"Fuck, listen to me," she continues, when she regains some of her composure. "You'd think _I_ was the one about to be chained to the flogging jut."

She pulls back a bit and takes a deep breath. "Karkat, I, I pity you, I pity you so much. No one should have to go through what you're going through." You ask yourself what you can even say to that.

The answer, you discover, as Terezi slowly, deliberately, _desperately_ presses her lips to yours, is nothing.

"...I don't want to lose you, Karkat."

You simply hug her tight and lean down to return her kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing Karezi wrong
> 
> Here's hoping I didn't screw this up too badly


	12. Day 22, part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which it hits the fan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a while! Like, four months, to be exact
> 
> I took a hiatus from this to work on stuff for the HSO (a lot of good it did, nobody liked anything we made) and then writer's block struck and ugh
> 
> I was going to write one huge chapter to wrap this story up but instead I'll break it up into several smaller parts, just so there's SOMETHING here, and this is the first

>Terezi: Wake up.

You awaken, still snuggled against Karkat in your livingblock and not daring to leave his side. Remembering the events of last night, you recall leading Karkat to your couch and simply taking comfort in one another's presence until the two of you fell asleep together.

It didn't exactly get anything accomplished, but... you needed this. A moment to breathe, to relax, to consider what you're fighting for.

What you're fighting for. You're almost certain you cannot help Karkat in what little time you have left. There has to be a way to save him. Perhaps you can figure out a way to hide him? Between you and your friends, surely there is something you can do. Come to think of it, you're almost certain Feferi alone could manage it. The heiress herself is exempt from the patrols' trials and with her resources, surely she could help?

It's something to think about, at any rate. But it's something you'll have to consider later, now that Karkat is waking up.

>Karkat: Wake up.

You are now Karkat, and your head hurts.

Understandable, since the last day or so has been particularly crazy. Though, you have to admit, not everything is completely terrible. Terezi leans against you, the two of you still huddled together under the blanket.

You think you have a matesprit now.

But that's just it. Terezi's trying her hardest and nothing's working and you can't blame her for your stupid thinkpan not being able to pick up on what she's teaching.

Your head hurts. You bring a hand to your temple and rub the side of your head.

She didn't deserve to be dragged into this. If blinding yourself is the stupid thing you've ever done, then having the audacity to ask for help after you were dumb enough to maim yourself is the second stupidest thing you've ever done, and certainly the most selfish. If you'd kept your chitinous windpipe shut, you could have just been culled and nobody would have cared, but now you've gotten Terezi emotionally invested in your survival, and you kind of hate yourself for that. She deserves better than you.

Your head throbs with every beat of your cardiovascular pump and it's only getting worse and it's ruining your current train of thought and you stand up shakily and try to feel your way around.

"Karkat?"

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, ow, you got any painkillers?"

"Um... sorry, no, I don't think so. Why?"

"Because my damn head feels like it's going to explode, is why."

You trip over a pile of law books, you're pretty sure, and stumble, clutching your head and muttering "son of a bitch" over and over again. Terezi rushes to your side, presumably to help you up, but you can practically feel the room spinning and there's no way you're getting back up on your feet right now.

You tell Terezi there's a bottle of painkillers at your hive and getting there would be quicker than shelling out the scarabs for them at the nearest store. She says she worries about leaving you alone, especially like this. You tell her you can handle lying on the floor by yourself for long enough for her to go there and back. She reluctantly agrees, since you seem to be in that much pain, and she sets your husktop by you before leaving. She says she's got an old PDA she used to use for FLARPing and if you need anything while she's gone, go ahead and ask.

>Later.

==>

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

GC: OK4Y K4RK4T 1M 4T YOUR H1V3  
GC: 1 FORGOT  
GC: WH3R3 D1D YOU S4Y YOU K3PT YOUR M3D1C1N3  
CG: FUCK  
CG: IN THE CABINET BY THE LOAD GAPER.  
CG: OW, FUCK ME, MY THINKPAN STILL HURTS.  
GC: 1M SORRY 1 D1DNT H4V3 4NY P41NK1LL3RS 1N MY H1V3 KAR  
GC: 1 D1DNT R34L1Z3 1 W4S OUT >:[  
GC: 1 JUST DONT US3 TH3M TH4T MUCH S1NC3 1 QU1T FL4RP1NG  
CG: SHIT, I'M SORRY, I SHOULDN'T MAKE YOU WORRY SO MUCH.  
CG: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM IS, ONE MOMENT I'M FINE AND THE NEXT IT FEELS LIKE MY BRAIN IS SLAMMING ITSELF AGAINST THE INSIDE OF MY DAMN SKULL AND NOW SOLLUX'S FUCKING SPEECH-TO-TEXT THING IS SENDING YOU EVERY STUPID THING I MUTTER TO MYSELF.  
GC: OK4Y 1 FOUND TH3M  
GC: TH3 BLU3 BOTTL3, R1GHT?  
CG: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT. THANKS.  
CG: MAYBE SOON ENOUGH I'LL GET SOME RELIEF.  
GC: 1LL B3 B4CK SHORTLY  
GC: H3H3, 1 TH1NK YOUR LUSUS 1S GO1NG TO GO M4D 1F H3 DO3SNT G3T A RO3 CUB3 B3FOR3 1 L34V3  
CG: THE FUCK WAS THAT?  
GC: >:?  
GC: 1 M34N OK4Y, 1 WONT G1V3 H1M ON3 1F YOU R34LLY DONT W4NT M3 TO  
CG: NO, NOT THAT.  
CG: DID YOU SEND SOMEONE OVER TO YOUR HIVE? I THINK THERE'S SOMEONE HERE. I COULD SWEAR I JUST HEARD FOOTSTEPS.  
CG: I KNOW YOU WERE WORRIED ABOUT LEAVING ME HERE ALONE BUT IT'S NOT A LONG TRIP. DID YOU SEND SOLLUX OVER OR SOMETHING?  
CG: TEREZI, ARE YOU THERE?

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] is an idle troll! --

CG: GREAT TIME TO GO IDLE, REZ.  
CG: FUCKING INCREDIBLE.  
CG: WHO'S THERE?  
CG: SOLLUX IS THAT YOU?  
CG: TAVROS? GAMZEE? KANAYA?  
CG: ...EQUIUS?  
CG: OKAY WHOEVER YOU ARE, I KNOW I HEARD YOU. QUIT FUCKING AROUND!  
CG: WHOA SHIT WHAT THE HELL LET GO OF ME  
CG: OW FUCK WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM  
CG: HEY WHAT THE  
CG: FUCKING STOP IT  
CG: [2PEECH2TEXT ERROR: could not re2olve 2peech pattern. maybe tell kk to 2peak normally iin2tead of liike a tool.]  
CG: OH GOD, NOT  
CG: GAHHHHGGGGGG [uniintelliigiible]  
GC: OK4Y 1 G4V3 YOUR LUSUS 4 CUB3  
GC: K4RK4T?  
GC: K4RK4T, WH4TS WRONG?  
GC: WH4T H4PP3N3D  
GC: 4R3 YOU OK4Y  
GC: WH4TS GO1NG ON

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] is an idle troll! --

GC: FUCK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's hoping it's not another four months before the next update!


	13. Day 22, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a search party is organized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so sorry

>Karkat: Wake up.

Your dead eyes slowly flutter open. Your head, you notice with some annoyance, still throbs with every beat of your pump. You're being held upright, for reasons that aren't clear to you yet. Your feet don't seem to be touching the floor. You try to move your arm in what you're sure is a futile attempt to get free and massage the pain away, but you quickly discover that your arms and legs are bound by some sort of thick rope.

You aren't sure what the fuck is going on, but you're pretty sure this isn't one of Terezi's games, and that you may actually be in danger. You open your right hand and try to activate sicklekind, but instead of the feeling of smooth cold iron against your palm, you get nothing but a low buzz. It's the telltale sign of an empty specibus, and you don't like it. Whoever did this was thorough and obviously didn't want you fighting back. You tug against your restraints, but to no avail.

You hear a faint clicking sound from below, but it quickly passes. Perhaps it's nothing.

>Meanwhile.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board R41NBOW RUMPUS P4RTYTOWN.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW set memo privacy: INVITE ONLY.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT adiosToreador [CAT] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT terminallyCapricious [CTC] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT twinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT grimAuxiliatrix [CGA] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT centaursTesticle [CCT] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT apocalpyseAverted [CAA] RIGHT NOW to memo.

CGC: YOU 4LL KNOW WHY 1 1NV1T3D YOU H3R3  
CTC: WaIt, I Do?  
CAT: i, aM PRETTY SURE THAT i DON'T,  
CGC: 1TS  
CGC: 4BOUT K4RK4T >:[  
CCT: D --> Er  
CCT: D --> I  
CCT: D --> I am not at liberty to discuss this matter  
CGC: 3QU1US TH1S 1S POSS1BLY 4 M4TT3R OF L1F3 4ND D34TH  
CGC: 4ND B3S1D3S 3V3RYON3 1N TH1S M3MO KNOWS 4BOUT K4RK4T'S BL1NDN3SS 4LR34DY  
CGA: What Do You Mean  
CGA: Life And Death  
CGA: Is Something Wrong Terezi

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW sent the file "trollian_carcinogeneticist.log" to memo on board R41NBOW RUMPUS P4RTYTOWN.

CGC: 1 W4S GO1NG TO K4RK4T'S H1V3 TO G3T SOM3 P41NK1LL3RS  
CGC: 1 K3PT 4 PD4 ON M3 SO H3 COULD US3 TH3 SP33CH-TO-T3XT PROGR4M SOLLUX WROT3 FOR H1M 1N C4S3 H3 N33D3D TO CONT4CT M3 WH1LE 1 W4S 4W4Y  
CGC: 4ND SOM3TH1NG H4PP3N3D 4ND NOW K4RK4T 1S M1SS1NG  
CGC: TH1S 1S TH3 L4ST M3SS4G3 H3 S3NT M3 4ND 1M WORR13D TH4T SOM3TH1NG T3RR1BL3 H4S H4PP3N3D  
CTC: wHoA, tHiS Is mOtHeRfUcKiN' hEaVy sHiT, bRoS.  
CTC: wHaT Do yOu tHiNk HaPpEnNeD To hIm?  
CGC: 1 DONT KNOW >:[  
CGC: H3 W4SNT 4T MY H1V3 WH3N 1 C4M3 B4CK 4ND TH4T W4S 4BOUT TH1RTY M1NUT3S 4GO  
CGC: 4LL 1 KNOW 1S TH4T 1T COULDNT H4V3 B33N 4N 4CC1D3NT  
CGC: 1 OP3N3D TH3 M3MO HOP1NG M4YB3 ON3 OF YOU KN3W SOM3TH1NG  
CTA: ii miight be able two a22i2t here.  
CTA: tz do you 2tiil have kk'2 hu2ktop at your hiive?  
CGC: Y34H  
CGC: TH3 SCR33N 1S CR4CK3D BUT 1T ST1LL WORKS  
CTA: do me a couple of favor2.  
CTA: open trolliian on kk'2 husktop, hold the 2 and 2 keys, and double cliick on the 2peech-two-text iicon.  
CGC: 2 4ND 2 >:?  
CTA: 2 and s. 2orry, ii 2hould have 2peciifiied.  
CGC: OK  
CGC: TH4T BROUGHT UP SOM3 SORT OF M3NU  
CGC: "D3BUG TOOL2"  
CTA: YE2222 ii forgot two comment that out!!  
CTA: the way my program work2 ii2, iit capture2 audiitory iinput and analyze2 iit to generate the text output.  
CTA: iit only keep2 one biit of audiio at a tiime and it'2 2uppo2ed two delete iit after proce22iing iit, but 2iince the debug tool2 2tiil work, the la2t thiing kk 2ent you 2hould 2tiil be in there.  
CTA: there 2hould be an button, "export audiio". cliick that and upload the 2ound fiile.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW sent the file "2peech2text_lastsound.wav" to memo on board R41NBOW RUMPUS P4RTYTOWN.

>Meanwhile.

"Hey, asshole! I don't know what your problem is, but if you don't let me go--" 

A voice shushes you from below. You reply, in a somewhat lower volume, "No, you fucking listen to me! If you don't let me go then so help me--" 

"Karkat, please! You have to be quiet or you'll wake her up!" It is a familiar voice, though not the one you heard back at Terezi's hive, and not one you can immediately place. 

"I'm stuck here just like you, but you can't be loud, not here, not here," she says. 

"What do you mean, not here? How do you know my name? Where even _are_ we? Because it's a fucking mystery to me!" 

"I guess Terezi really wasn't lying when she said you couldn't see." 

Your eyelids involuntarily widen at that. "You know Terezi? Wait!" 

You think you know where you have heard this voice before, but... why is she here? 

==>

CGA: That Voice  
CGA: !  
CGA: I Would Know It Anywhere  
CGA: Oh  
CGA: I  
CGA: I Think This May Be My Fault  
CGA: I Am So Sorry  
CGC: D4MN1T!!!  
CGC: 1 SHOULD H4V3 KNOWN SH3 WOULD B3 UP TO NO GOOD  
CGC: 1 LET MY GU4RD DOWN JUST ONC3 4ND NOW  
CGC: NOW 1  
CGC: BL4R >:[ >:[ >:[  
CGC: 1T H4SNT B33N V3RY LONG S1NC3 SH3 TOOK H1M  
CGC: 1F W3 MOV3 F4ST W3 C4N ST1LL S4V3 H1M  
CGC: 1M SURE SH3 M34NS TO F33D H1M TO H3R LUSUS  
CGC: BUT 1 KNOW HOW SH3 WORKS, VR1SK4 C4NT P4SS UP 4N OPPORTUN1TY TO GR4NDST4ND  
CGC: SH3 H4SNT TROLL3D M3 TO GLO4T SO TH3R3S 4 V3RY GOOD CH4NC3 H3S ST1LL 4L1V3  
CGC: M33T UP 4T MY H1V3 4S4P 4ND W3LL R3SCU3 H1M TOG3TH3R  
CGC: SH3 CROSS3D TH3 L1N3 TH1S T1M3  
CGC: 1 SW34R 1F SH3 HURTS K4RK4T ILL  
CGC: 1LL FUCK1NG K1LL H3R MYS3LF  
CCT: D --> Are you absolutely sure this is the best course of a%ion  
CGC: HOW C4N YOU S4Y TH4T  
CGC: 1SNT K4RK4T YOUR FR13ND TOO  
CGC: W1TH YOUR STR3NGTH R3SCU1NG H1M WOULD B3 NO PROBL3M 4T 4LL!  
CCT: D --> I am simply saying that there might be  
CCT: D --> E%tenuating circumstances  
CCT: D --> My STRENGTH has no bearing on the situation at hand  
CGC: UGH F1NE!  
CGC: 3V3RYON3 3XC3PT 3QU1US TH3N C4N M33T M3 H3R3  
CCT: D --> No, you don't understand  
CCT: D --> I cannot allow you to attack Miss Serket  
CGC: WH4T!  
CGC: WHY NOT  
CGC: WH4TS GO1NG ON W1TH YOU 3QU1US  
CGC: 4CTUALLY 1F YOUR3 GO1NG TO OBSTRUCT JUST1C3 TH3N 1 DONT CAR3  
CGC: W3LL DO TH1S W1THOUT YOU

CGC banned CCT from responding to memo.  
CGC kicked CCT from memo.

CGC closed memo.

==>

"...Nepeta? Is that you?" 

She sniffles and her voice cracks as she replies. "Y-yeah. It's me. I'm sorry you got mixed up in this, K-Karkat." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I guess I should probably apologize for this fic never updating, ever.
> 
> Those of you who follow my tumblr already know but for those of you who don't, I've been struggling with depression for some time, and just recently started actually doing something about it (hooray for therapy, I guess), and that combined with my awful job has been kicking my ass all over the place, and the result is that I don't seem to write nearly as much as I used to.
> 
> Which sucks, because I like writing.
> 
> I'm going to try to finish the rest of the story as quickly as I can. I think there are at most three or four more parts left to go, but if I keep my current pace then Homestuck itself will conclude before this fic does, so I'm going to try to crank out chapters at least a little bit faster.
> 
> Thanks for putting up with my nonexistent update schedule.


	14. Day 22, part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Equius is put between a rock and a hard place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god, where do I even begin
> 
> I am so sorry for this

>Hours in the past, but not many.

You are now EQUIUS ZAHHAK.

>Equius: Contemplate.

You stand at your balcony, having finished your latest robot scuffle as the light of the green moon just begins to drown out the last rays of the setting sun. A slight breeze blows through your hair as you face the hive of a certain cerulean-blood by the name of Vriska Serket.

Something is not right, and it doesn't occur to you just what that is until Aurthor brings you a fresh towel and you have wiped the last of the sweat from your brow: Vriska has gone quiet. You have seen neither hide nor hair of your neighbor or her ravenous lusus for... how long? Most of the last perigree, you believe. It is entirely unlike her usual modus operandi of grandstanding and boasts and reveling in conquest. And a quiet Vriska, the past has shown, is a mischevious, conniving Vriska. She cannot possibly be up to any good.

Perhaps an intervention is necessary.

"Aurthor."

You hand the now-damp towel to your lusus and take a deep breath, bending your knees ever-so-slightly before extending into a STRONG leap off the balcony. The wind whips through your hair, your vision blurring as your oculars moisten, and you land on your feet with a thud on the rocky outcropping below, startling your moirail who had been playing with a squeakbeast she likely intended to devour. Dust clouds swirl around you in the moment you hesitate before breaking into a sprint in the direction of Vriska's hive, rocks and bits of earth flung into the air.

"Whatcha doin'?" Nepeta asks as she clings to your back, because _of course_ a moment is all she needed to attach herself to you.

"Err... checking on my neighbor."

"You think Vriskers is up to something?"

"Possibly. She is every bit as dangerous as her blue blood suggests."

"...you think she might do something to Karkitty too, don't you."

"I don't know." And you honestly don't. It's a long shot, and the two of you have been careful, but Vriska, in her own words, has a finger in every pie and an iron in every fire, and you are certain it's not beyond her ability to not only find out about the Vantas boy's disability, but to already have some sort of plan in action to use such easy prey as food for the monstrous spider that lurks in the canyon seperating your hives. You are vaguely aware that he has been staying with and is under the protection of one Terezi Pyrope, thanks to Nepeta, but you cannot predict the outcome of a battle pitting sister against Scourge Sister.

You land with a reverberating THUD at Vriska's front door.

"So what are we looking for?" Nepeta asks.

" _We_ are not looking for anything. _I_ am simply paying a visit to my neighbor."

"Oh come on, I would be lots of help and you know it!" she says with a pout. "I'm sneaker than you and I don't break efurrything I touch! And besides, what if she really is trying to get Karkat?"

"Then I suggest checking up on him through Trollian, or in person. Two trolls sleuthing about might cause problems, and you are more susceptible to Vriska's powers of manipulation than I am. I won't have her making you willingly leap into that _creature's_ throat."

She opens her mouth to argue, but you have a point.

"Well... okay. You got me on this one. But you'd better purromise me you won't do anything stupid!"

"Nepeta, please. I am only checking up on a neighbor who hasn't been seen in some time."

"Boost me?"

"Climb up."

Nepeta jumps up onto your arm before you wind up and propel her across the gap with a STRONG TOSS. When the dust cloud you've worked up finally disapates and you can visually confirm Nepeta landed safely on the other side (also, your PDA beeps and AC: :33 < made it! *ac is off to visit terezi and karkitty* appears on the screen), you turn around to knock on Vriska's door.

It breaks down into splinters after the third knock.

>Nepeta: Visit Terezi.

It is a rather uneventful and short trip to Terezi's hive. You climb up the side of the tree supporting the bulk of her residence and are somewhat surprised to find the place empty, and the door ajar.

"Terezi? Are you here?"

Something doesn't feel right. This doesn't seem like one of her games. You step into her livingblock and books lie open on the floor, a few torn pages blowing in the draft from the open door. A ruined purple husktop with a cracked screen sits on the couch. Your claws pop from your gloves with a near-silent _snikt_ just in case there's some kind of funny business going here.

"Ummmmmmm... Terezi? Karkat? What's going on?"

You hear the sound of something small clattering onto the floor behind you.

>Equius: Investigate.

You're trying, gosh darn it, but there's nothing to discover. It's as if Vriska simply abandoned the place with naught but the clothes on her back. Bookshelves lined with character sheets and FLARP campaign manuals are coated with a thick layer of dust.

You open the door to a small interior room. There are no windows, and the only illumination comes from what little light passes through the crack of the door and a flashing red bulb on a device in the middle of the room. Some kind of communication device? Maybe you were _meant_ to find it.

No, that's stupid. Actually looking at it reveals the screen is displaying a low battery warning, further proof that Vriska hasn't been here in some time. But if she isn't here, where could she be? And why would she leave so suddenly?

Your Trollgle Glasses blink, indicating an incoming message. These things are so handy.

>Equius: Check message.

You place a finger to your earpiece, and a transparent Trollian window pops up right on the lenses of your shades. Technology is _amazing._

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling centaursTesticle [CT] \--

AG: I have something that 8elongs to you, and I suggest you do exactly as I say if you want it 8ack.  
arachnidsGrip [AG] sent the file img33_4131025.jpg to centaursTesticle [CT].

Confused, you reach a finger to the earpiece of your glasses. You are greeted with the sight of Vriska standing over a very unconscious Nepeta, and only the urgency of the situation prevents you from snapping your glasses in half in raw fury.

CT: D --> You will let her go this instant  
AG: No. No, I won't.  
AG: I have come too far and put myself in WAAAAAAAAY too much danger to stop now.  
CT: D --> Do you  
CT: D --> Seriously believe  
CT: D --> That there is a place on Alternia  
CT: D --> Neigh  
CT: D --> The gala%y  
CT: D --> Where you will be safe from my wrath if you harm so much as one keratin tendril on her head  
CT: D --> You will release Nepeta immediately and I will mercifully pretend this 100dicrous e%change never happened  
AG: No. I won't. You don't GET it, DO YOU, Equius? I'M. DONE. FUCKING. AROUND.  
AG: Things are getting desper8 and you're too much of a wild card to just leave to chance.  
AG: Here's what's going to happen. YOU'RE going to keep Terezi fucking Pyrope and her merry 8and of assholes 8usy while I put things 8ack to the awesome status quo of 8eing on top where I god damned 8elong.  
AG: I'm taking your precious moirail for safekeeping. The octet has done a wonderful jo8 of keeping her nice and quiet and compliant and most of all, too KO'd to do much of anything a8out it.  
AG: And don't even THINK of 8ringing your little pail8ot Megido into this, 8ecause I'm ready for her, too. I told you, I'm done fucking around. I don't like playing hard8all 8ut you'll find I'm VERY good at it when I've 8een sufficiently provoked.  
AG: When I say jump, you ask how high, how far, and whether I want you to do a flip. You do what I say, when I say it, nothing more and nothing less.  
AG: You stick to the plan of following my exact orders to the fucking letter, and I can promise you'll see Nepeta unharmed at the end of all this.  
AG: Do I make myself clear.  
CT: D --> I  
AG: DO I.  
CT: D --> Are you planning to hurt the Vantas boy  
AG: I'm warning you, Equius. You have ONE MORE CHANCE to get on my fucking level. You either play the game 8y my rules, or my lusus gets a dou8le helping tonight.  
AG: It doesn't matter to me. Either way, I get what I want. You should consider yourself lucky that I 8othered to give you this chance in the first place.

You don't like this. You don't like this, you don't like this, you don't like this. But... what choice do you have?

CT: D --> I  
AG: Yeeeeeeeessssssss?  
CT: D --> I'll do it  
AG: Good 8oy. Now get the F8CK out of my hive and w8 for instructions.  
\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling centaursTesticle [CT] \--

Your glasses short out and the display fades from the sheer amount of sweat they've been exposed to. You would be angrier about this, but current circumstances have left you understandably shaken.

Your PDA beeps.

>Equius: Check PDA.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board R41NBOW RUMPUS P4RTYTOWN.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW set memo privacy: INVITE ONLY.

CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT adiosToreador [CAT] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT terminallyCapricious [CTC] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT twinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT grimAuxiliatrix [CGA] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT centaursTesticle [CCT] RIGHT NOW to memo.  
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW invited CURRENT apocalpyseAverted [CAA] RIGHT NOW to memo.

CGC: YOU 4LL KNOW WHY 1 1NV1T3D YOU H3R3  
CTC: WaIt, I Do?  
CAT: i, aM PRETTY SURE THAT i DON'T,  
CGC: 1TS  
CGC: 4BOUT K4RK4T >:[  
CCT: D --> Er

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, 2013! Not my best year. Spent most of it in a job I hated, before getting fired from said job, then bouncing around from shitty job to shitty job for bullshit reasons and seriously wanting to kill myself before getting to where I am now.
> 
> Oh yeah, and I kind of didn't update this fic for over an entire year ._.
> 
> This part is so short. It is not worth the year you guys waited for it, and I saw all your comments and I felt like such an asshole every time someone hoped for an update soon in the last chapter, because for some reason people still like my work despite the fact that I can't seem to write all that much anymore :(
> 
> So yeah, this part that took over a fucking YEAR? It's so short and it proves I can't write Equius and Nepeta at all, and hell I'm probably getting Vriska wrong too, christ I'm so rusty
> 
> But there it is
> 
> I do know how the rest of the story goes, it's all up in my head, it's just a matter of actually getting it into a text file and posting it. Here's hoping it doesn't take another year before I update this again.
> 
> I am so, so sorry, this should have taken like a week to write, tops


	15. Day 22, part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a one-sided fistfight takes place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT WAS ONLY 26 DAYS BETWEEN UPDATES THIS TIME

>Be present Equius.

To say that you are unhappy with yourself would be a STRONG understatement. You are to blame for your moirail's current predicament, and you know it. Vriska knows Terezi has rounded up a posse in search of her, in an effort to save the Vantas boy, and she has left it to you to deal with the threat.

Under better circumstances, you think you would have liked to join them.

You stand at the base of the tree supporting Terezi's hive. You have only been here once before, to escort Nepeta home after a night of playing with her best friends, but it is almost exactly as you remember it. Your gaze turns to the jury-rigged elevator making its descent. Her party is composed of a blind girl; the psionic mustardblood; the sopor-drunk highblood; a "fashionista", as though that were a thing; and Tavros. They will not, _could not_ pose a threat to you.

But your own well-being has never really been something you were all that concerned with. You may have met most of them through Nepeta but you have come to see these trolls as your friends, and your sudden, unexplained betrayal must run them through like the cruelest of daggers.

Nepeta. Dear God, what would _she_ think of all this? Of you willingly serving Vriska, standing against your mutual friends like this? But if you don't, she will surely be fed to the monstrous lusus.

The best course of action eludes you.

>Terezi: Leave the elevator with your group.

"God _damnit_ ," Sollux mutters under his breath. Through the muddled greens and purples of the forest floor, you can detect an imposing, sickly sour blue raspberry drenched in sweat.

"Get out of our way." You have no time for games.

"No," he replies, after a moment.

"Why are you doing this, Equius? Where's Nepeta? Does she know about this?"

"I STRONGLY suggest returning to your hive immediately, Pyrope."

"I will _not!_ Vriska has Karkat and we're going to stop her with or without you!"

You take two steps forward before hearing the _crack_ of Equius's knuckles as he drops into a fighting stance.

"You will not advance. I will not allow it. Do _not_ cross me."

You take a deep breath to steel yourself, to calm your nerves. Equius is a dangerous opponent and you cannot hope to defeat him in direct combat any more than you can hope to challenge the _rain_. But what hope does Karkat have if you do not try?

You draw your cane. Thrice from behind you comes the telltale sound of three stife decks unloading their contents to their respective wielders' hands and the deep rumbling _roar_ of Kanaya priming her chainsaw soon after. Sollux's hands and eyes glow apple red and berry blue as he levitates about a foot in the air.

Equius looks at the ground and sighs in an almost imperceptively sad way, before slamming his fist into his open hand.

"...if this is how it must be, _so be it._ "

>Equius: Destroy these fools.

No. What you have already agreed to, in order to keep your moirail safe, is bad enough. You will not resort to seriously harming her friends; you will exercise STRONG restraint in this strife.

You will be agonizingly careful.

Terezi is the first to charge you, teeth bared and voice low and growing full of fury. The chain of her cane extends and sends its striking tip hurtling to dead center of your forehead in the hopes of knocking you out before the fight can even truly begin. It bounces off your skull with a dull _thud_ , completely failing to harm you in any manner whatsoever.

She swears under her breath. Tavros takes a step backwards, and clutches his daggerlance to his chest.

Terezi circles around you, a cane segment in each hand as she twirls the striking tip in preperation for another opening. Sollux takes to the sky to gain the height advantage.

"Bro... fuck, why are we fighting Equius again, man? I don't up and fuckin' get it," Gamzee asks.

"Because, he is working with Vriska and, uhh, he doesn't want us to rescue Karkat, for reasons that are, um, unclear," Tavros stammers.

"Whaaaaat! Shit, that's pretty fuckin' uncool of a brother to just all up and do that to a guy. Shit's gettin' me downright righteous motherfucking _heated_ ," Gamzee responds with a snarl. He is the next to charge you, clubs spinning, whistling as they cut through the air. He closes the distance and latches onto your back, trying to choke you out with a sleeper hold. Terezi makes another attempt to strike with her cane, and you effortlessly deflect it with the palm of your hand.

You switch to half-bowkind, so that you may use the halves of your broken bow to pry Gamzee off you, instead of crushing his bones with your bare hands. He lets go of his own accord when he sees Kanaya rushing your position, the engine of her chainsaw roaring. You drop your broken bow and turn to face her, just in time to see her holding the saw high overhead, ready to sink its whirling teeth into your flesh.

Kanaya brings her chainsaw down, and you manage to catch the flat side of the blade between your palms. A little more pressure is all it takes to bend and _break_ steel between your hands and reduce her weapon to little more than a sputtering engine and broken chain. A metal shard flies directly at Tavros and bounces off of a red and blue glowing _nothing_ before coming straight for you. You narrowly dodge a chainsaw tooth that couldn't possibly have homed in on you like that by itself. Kanaya tosses her ruined chainsaw aside and your eyes move to the forest canopy.

You can barely see him, but Sollux is up there. You squat for a fraction of a second before extending your knees and STRONG leaping directly at him, the plan being to grab him, force him back down to ground level and knock him out so he can't redirect sharp metal debris at your throat anymore.

That's the plan, anyway, but he catches you in midair with his psionics, leaving you hanging in the air and frozen in place. This only serves to piss you off. "What powers do you think you have that are remotely comparable to my STRENGTH?"

"What powers, you ask?" he chuckles to himself as he pulls you and himself up, through the foliage, above the treetops. "Oh, I dunno, how about the power of _flight?_ That do anything for you? That's levitation, holmes."

You begin to feel yourself being dragged back down, faster than what gravity should be moving you, and you realize what's happening when your body starts glowing blue and red.

"How about the power to kill a musclebeast from two hundred yards away? With _mind bullets!_ " Sollux screams, as the both of you hurtle toward the forest floor. Your back collides with a tree trunk, snapping it in half and sending wooden splinters everywhere, seconds before you _smash_ into the ground with enough force to leave a small crater. You look up and see a portion of the broken tree headed for you, cloaked in red and blue psychic energy.

"That's _telekinesis_ , EQ!"

You roll hard to the side, narrowly dodging the wooden projectile; the force of Sollux's telekinetic assault embeds it into the ground, sending dust and rocks and bits of dirt flying everywhere. Groggily, you right yourself and wipe the dirt from your brow as you stand doubled over; that attack has left you a bit out of breath and kind of sore. Glancing upwards, you can just barely make out Sollux's eyes glowing before a bubble of light surrounds you. He means to keep you pinned with a psionic force field; you won't give him the opportunity.

You briefly drop into a three-point stance before sprinting up the length of the embedded trunk and _springing_ at the glowing wall encircling you. Seconds before your body would make contact, you cock back your fist and throw all of your weight into a fearsome haymaker. Your hand slams against the barrier, shattering it via sheer force.

The light in Sollux's eyes fades, and he slowly flutters to the ground before stumbling a bit, falling to his knees, and vomiting from the mental strain. He'll live, but he'll be out of commission for a while.

Terezi charges you again, cane flailing wildly as you dodge and block the incoming strikes. It's only after he latches onto your back again that you realize Terezi's attack was a ruse, intented to distract you from Gamzee's approach.

"Yo, man, why a motherfucker got to all up and get his harshest of hates on for Karbro! Vriska's mad motherfuckin' _crazy_ and I don't fuckin' GET it why you'd all go and work for a motherfuckin' backstabber like that! I thought we was TIGHT, man!" Gamzee screams into your auditory channels as he desperately tries to choke you out.

"Gamzee! The bow!" Terezi shouts.

"Aw shit, sis, I almost motherfuckin' forgot all _about_ that miraculous shiznite! Hold up a sec!" The halves of the broken bow materialize in his hands and he quickly loops the string around your neck.

"Alright man, this ain't sit easy with me but you know how you're always fuckin' going on about how I ought to be callin' the motherfuckin' _shots_ on account of this sweet purpley elixir coursin' through my veins? Yeah, imma need you to stay the motherfuck PUT. Sit tight, my brother."

You find yourself unwilling to disobey your blood superior, and you fall to a knee.

Gamzee lets go of you, the bowstring still tied around your throat, slowly tightening and beginning to close your chitinous windpipe. "I don't like this any fuckin' more than you do, Eqbro, but I gots to rescue Karkat, you know what I mean?" he says as you are now completely unable to breathe and on the verge of losing consciousness.

Your eyes close and you are just about to black out when he tells you "I'm so sorry, I know this ain't right at all but fuck, man, you know you'd do the same if your sweet palekitty Nep-Nep was in trouble."

...Nepeta? Where is she? Wait. She's... she's in trouble.

_Vriska._ Your eyes shoot open and your hands immediately move to your throat. The bowstring snaps and you take a deep breath as you stand up.

"Shiiiiiiiiiiiit, shit shit shit, motherfuck! Tez, this ain't workin' out, we got to DO something right the fuck quick!" Gamzee discards the broken bow and retrieves his clubs, and this time it is Terezi who tries to choke you out from behind, cane held tightly against your throat.

You throw both of them off of you with a mighty shrug. Gamzee smashes against a tree and slumps to the ground, KO'd. Terezi is thrown a few yards back; she is unharmed but her cane lies on the ground in pieces, and she is as good as incapacitated without a weapon.

Tavros finally and slowly steps toward you. "I, uh, I can't let you hurt my friends. Not anymore, I mean. I don't have a lot of, um, courage, at this particular point in time, but, despite that, I am going to try to stop you, because I might be the only one who can."

He holds up his daggerlance, shaking as he advances. It's kind of pitiful, really.

"I, um... en garde."

You grab the daggerlance out of his hand and spike it into the ground at his feet. It's buried deep enough that not even the handle is visible.

"...oh."

You turn around to address Terezi's group. "All of you, return to your hives immediately."

Terezi stands up and begins walking to you, limping and holding her arm. "Why?! Why are you doing this?! Isn't he YOUR friend, too?! Why are you helping Vriska? You KNOW what she's going to do him!"

You are unable to answer her, not just because you cannot bring yourself to look her in the eye but also because your PDA beeps. You're kind of surprised it still works after Sollux dropped you out of the sky.

>Equius: Check message.

\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling centaursTesticle [CT] \--  
arachnidsGrip [AG] wants to begin video chat. Accept/decline?  
Accepted! Video chat is now active.

Vriska's camera reveals she's in some sort of cave. "You don't have a camera on your PDA? Haha, laaaaaaaame! So I trust our little _problem_ is dealt with?"

"...Yes. They won't trouble you."

"Gooooooood! Then it looks as though I'll be holding up my end of the bargain once this is through. Here, give me a minute and I'll even show you she's safe and sound."

"SERKET!" Terezi hisses. "I'll see you fucking HANG for this, mark my words!"

"Hahahahahahahaha, is that Terezi? Tell her I hate her too but I'm not really looking for a kismesis right now after that whole deal with Eridan. Ugh, _that_ guy, did you know he tried to--"

Whatever train of thought Vriska has is interrupted on her end by a horrible screech and the sound of falling rocks. Part of the rocky wall behind her crumbles. But that's not half as disqueiting as the scream that comes soon afterward.

You'd know that voice anywhere.

"NEPETA!"

In the video feed, the dust from the collapse begins to settle, and you can just barely make out a familiar-looking structure. You are wracking your thinkpan trying to remember where you've seen it before when you realize it's the top of Vriska's hive.

She's in the canyon seperating your hives.

"Pipe down, would ya! Sheeeeeeeesh, you're getting fed soon enough!" Vriska shouts at something offscreen. "Don't worry, she can't get us up here, she can't reach this far--"

"I'm coming for you, Serket. You're going to STRONGLY regret the day you threatened _my_ moirail."

Vriska's face contorts into disgust. "Hey! What part of 'stick to the plan or your moirail is lusus food' DIDN'T you fucking understand? I-- oh."

She has just noticed the gaping hole in the wall behind her.

"Oh. _Shit._ " The video feed cuts out.

\-- centaursTesticle [CT] began trolling apocalypseAverted [AA] \--  
CT: D -> Aradia  
CT: D -> I am returning to the hive shortly  
AA: what's g0ing 0n? i heard s0me c0mm0ti0n 0utside  
CT: D -> Vriska has Nepeta and Karkat  
CT: D -> We will need to move quickly to stop her  
CT: D -> Be ready, we will move on my return  
AA: 0k  
\-- centaursTesticle [CT] ceased trolling apocalypseAverted [AA] \--

That is as far as you are able to contain your rage at the situation. You throw your PDA in frustration as hard as you can, and it disappears over the horizon.

"...She has Nepeta, too. This is all my fault," are the only words you can offer to the group in your own defense.

"Wait!" Terezi shouts before you can leave, making you pause. "I know her better than anyone, and she'll be ready for this, I can guarantee it. I might not have a weapon but I know how Vriska operates. I'm coming with you."

You turn to the length of the tree trunk, still embedded in the ground from Sollux's attack, and spy a particularly straight and sturdy-looking branch. You effortlessly snap it off and break off a length suitable for use as a makeshift weapon before handing it to Terezi.

"I realize this is... less than optimal, but will it do for now?"

"It'll have to," she replies as she allocates it to her strife deck. "Kanaya, get everyone into Sollux's scuttlebuggy and meet up at Equius's hive, we might need you guys."

"Understood."

"Hang on and hold tight, Miss Pyrope," you say as you squat down. Terezi jumps onto you, taking hold of your back. You start jogging, then break into a sprint before taking to the air in a STRONG vault, your arms held up above you to protect the both of you from foliage as you breech the forest canopy.

It is time you paid your neighbor a visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how do you write a five-on-one fight and not have it be ridiculously one-sided? That was what I asked myself going into this chapter. In most cases it's by having the one guy be really strong, but in this one, the one guy is Equius, so the question is how do I keep him from kicking everyone's asses almost immediately?
> 
> The answer is, you don't, because you can't, because Equius is the STRONGEST there is.
> 
> We're coming up on the end now! And honestly, I think it shows. I kind of really want to finish this and I think the quality of my writing is suffering for it, but I guess you guys will be the judge of that.
> 
> The next part won't be the final chapter, but we're getting there, and after than there's still an epilogue I want to write, so stay tuned!


End file.
